The Freedom of Destiny
by Kat Loussier
Summary: A chance meeting in Orb. The war brings to wayward souls together to brave the trials that it brings. But destiny and fate play a cruel hand. [Sexual abuse, rape?, lemon, yaoi, ShinnKira, dark]
1. Phase 1: A Fateful Encounter

**A/N:** Alright, my writing these days has been getting more and more serious lately, and after reading Kiheada.Ray.T's story, I decided to start working on my own. I'll probably have to do some research on this, and believe me when I say that the content of this story is no laughing matter. I am not a very humorous writer, I take my writing very seriously, and this story will be very serious, any light-hearted moments will not have anything to do with the relationship between Gilbert Durandul and Shinn Asuka.

I will give fair warning to all who read this story, if you do not wish to read about then leave. I am in no way condoning this kind of behavior, and in fact, I find it repulsive. **I DO NOT CONDONE THIS.**

Also: this story deviates quite far from the actual storyline, I've invented things for this sake of this story, but I will try to incorporate as many of the original details as I can. This chapter is unbetaed, I have to wait for my beta for this story to come online so I can send it to them... for now, you guys can make do with this version.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam SEED Destiny, if I did, the series would have turned out a LOT differently. I only own any original characters that make an appearance in this story and the plot itself. So no suing me.

**Dedication:** This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

* * *

**Phase 1: A Fateful Encounter**

Shinn first met Kira in Orb, when the _Minerva_ was there after the Break the World incident. He'd wandered quite aimlessly, reacquainting himself with the place that had once been his home, when he'd stumbled onto the war memorial and literally fell head over heels for the attractive Coordinator.

Shinn had quite embarrassed himself when he'd tripped on some of the debris that littered the pathway of the memorial and nearly face planted into the cement walkway when Kira had caught him. The older Coordinator had said nothing about the incident, only quickly asking him if he was okay, tell him to be careful, and then helping him to his feet.

Blushing, Shinn muttered an apology and was about to hurriedly scurry away, when Kira had spoken up, "If you're uncomfortable, I can leave. There's really no reason for you to leave so suddenly after just arriving."

"Ah, no. I was... I was uhh... just leaving!" he'd spluttered, trying to fight down the blush in his cheeks.

"I forgot, I should probably should introduce myself," he held out his hand. "Kira Yamato, and you are?"

"Uhh... Shinn Asuka," Shinn took the hand, noting the smile that didn't quite reach Kira's eyes. His cheeks tinged a slight darker shade of pink despite his best efforts. Realizing the reason for his blush, Shinn tried to convince himself how _wrong_ his attraction was. Even though his mind rallied against it, his body accepted it.

* * *

Kira gauged the younger man's reaction closely, worried that the young man just might know his name and take it the wrong way; like so many people he'd met. So many friendships that had never been simply because of his association with the _Archangel_ and the _Freedom_. 

The fact that Shinn refused to meet his eyes worried Kira slightly, but when he noticed the dark pink blush that had smattered itself across Shinn's face, he slightly understood what was causing his obvious discomfort.

Deciding to tease the younger boy, he released his hand and placed it on his forehead, as if checking for a fever, "Are you alright Shinn-san? Do you have a fever?"

"N-no! I-I'm fine!" Shinn stuttered in obvious embarrassment, Kira slid his hand down to his cheek. He didn't jerk away from Kira's touch, in fact he leaned into it slightly. "And please, just call me Shinn..."

"Kira-san! Kira-san!"

The pair immediately jerked out of their positions, Shinn's faces demonstrating a shade of red that would put his uniform to shame. A young woman ran up to them, her heels clacking on the cement of the walkway as she ran up to join them.

Her dress was short, only coming down to her knees and was a pale pink color. A dark red, tie belt accentuated her narrow hips, it had a sort of halter-top like look to it, but no cleavage showed; although her chest looked to be of a decent size, if not a tad small.

"Kira-san!" she repeated, then realized that there was someone else there, she immediately smiled and held her own hand out to the blushing teen, "I'm Harmony Loussier, a friend of Kira-san's."

"Shinn Asuka."

"Good to know you Shinn-san," Harmony replied, she leaned in to whisper into his ear, "Kira-san's really hot, don't you think Shinn-san?" She giggled as he stuttered out a reply.

"Wh-what?! I-I..."

"A real catch wouldn't you say?"

Kira watched the exchange with amusement.

"H-Harmony-san! Th-that wasn't-"

"I'm just kidding Shinn-san!" she stopped giggled, although amusement still lingered on her face. "And no, I'm not Kira-san's girlfriend or anything; we're just friends."

"So what was that for then?!" his blush receded slightly as

"I was just testing you."

"Testing?! For what?!"

Smiling broadly, she linked her arms with both of theirs, slipping between them, "I don't really think this is the place to talk. How about we go down to that little cafe? What do you think Shinn-san? Can I treat you to a cup of coffee?"

Mumbling an affirmative, Shinn's blush returned with a vengeance.

"Oh good! We can all get to know each other a little better then! And I'm sure Kira-san doesn't mind! He doesn't get out enough."

"Harmony!" Kira admonished. "I do get out. I just don't go out on outing like this before."

"Tee hee! Don't worry so much Kira-san! Shinn-san says he doesn't mind getting dragged around, so let's take advantage of that! I'm sure Ramius-san and Waltfeld-san won't notice your extended absence yet!"

Vaguely, Shinn registered the names. They sounded vaguely familiar, but he couldn't place where he'd heard them before. Giving up on placing the names, he allowed Harmony to tug him through the streets, until they finally arrived at their destination.

It was a quaint little cafe at the corner of one of the quieter streets in the city. A wrought-iron, decorative fence surrounded the patio where several dozen table were located, each with an umbrella. A few people lingered in the chairs, Harmony led them to a secluded table in the corner.

Once they were all seated, Harmony spoke, "So what does everyone want? I'll go fetch our drinks, this place has truly divine iced green tea with lemon; and makes a great latte."

"I think I'll stick with iced tea," Shinn murmured, still a little nervous around the outgoing young woman and their more quiet companion.

"I'd like some tea, Harmony."

"Alright then!" She disappeared into the entrance of the cafe.

"She's a little out there, I know," Kira said into the silence. "But she means well." Seeming to read Shinn's expression, "She's a Coordinator, if you're wondering, she emigrated here from the PLANTs several years ago."

"What about you Kira-san?"

"Just Kira, Shinn. Me? I was originally from Heliopolis."

Remembering what had happened to that colony, Shinn responded, "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"It's alright; it happened a long time ago and my friends and I survived."

Chancing a glance up at Kira, Shinn blushed again, but managed to hold his gaze, "I... I used to live in Orb, until the Earth Alliance attacked... I lost my family in one of the battles... they believed in Orb's ideals and they died because of them!"

His fists tightened, and he felt tears forming at the corners of his eyes. Kira frowned and took the seat beside him, gently, he placed his hand over Shinn's trembling fist. His other hand tilted Shinn's face so he could see it.

"I know it's hard Shinn..." Kira murmured. "But even if you destroy Orb, it won't bring them back. I... I had to learn that the hard way... it was war. Orb refused to bow down to the Earth Alliance, and even though they lost, they fought back. They spawned something that helped to end the war."

"It's all the Athha's fault that they're dead! If they hadn't-"

"Shinn, it's no one's fault but those who insisted on keeping the fighting going-"

"Shinn, nothing is gained by blaming others," came Harmony's soft voice as she placed their drinks on the table and sat down on the other side of him. She placed her hand gently on his back. "If Orb had bowed to the Earth Alliance, they would have persecuted those of us Coordinators who call Orb home. If anyone is to blame, it is Blue Cosmos for pushing for the invasion of Orb and the fighting that ensued.

"I know it's hard to let go of your hatred, but please try. Hatred does nothing but hurt you more, you have to let it go," she paused, as if pondering something. "I know this may seem forward of me, but I would be really happy if you moved on beyond your hatred Shinn-san." She smiled brightly, "I think Kira-san and I both agree that we like you."

Shinn's blush darkened and he stared at the table as he tried to get his raging emotions under control. He hated to admit it, but Harmony had a point. It would just take him time to let go of it; he'd held onto it for so long that it would be difficult to let go of.

"I... I guess so. I'll give it a try."

Moving her seat away from him, she took her drink and sipped it, "Well, let's stop with all the serious talk for now. It's a beautiful evening, let's not waste it. This is a time to spend with friends."

Kira returned her smile and edged slightly away from Shinn, he took a sip from his own drink, "Yes, let's just spend this evening as friends and leave the darker matters to another time."

Feeling slightly awkward, Shinn took his drink and took a swig, the cool liquid swept down his throat, the sugar making him feel slightly giddy. A few moments of silence followed before Harmony made a suggestion, "Oh I know! Let's all exchange our cell phones and put our names and numbers in! That way we can all stay in touch with each other!"

She pulled out her phone, a slim red Razr, she placed it on the table in front of her before sliding it over to Shinn, "Put your name and number in there. I'll do the same with yours, then you and Kira-san can swap!"

Taking Mayu's cell phone out of his pocket, he gave it to Harmony. She input the data before handing it to Kira, who had his own phone lying in front of him. Shinn handed Harmony hers before shyly taking Kira's and putting in his name and number.

"There! Now we can all keep in touch with each other!" she beamed. "Once the world has settled down again, let's all meet at the memorial again. How does that sound?"

The two boys nodded their heads in agreement. The rest of the evening was spent in pleasant conversation and silence. The trio forming a close bond as time wore on. Shinn found himself becoming more and more at ease with the pair, finding that they understood him on a level that no one else had.

He didn't notice the time until Harmony remarked, "Hmm? Oh dear! It's already past eleven!"

"What?!" Shinn exclaimed, he should have been back at the _Minerva_ an hour before! He remembered putting Mayu's phone on silent, he checked his messages. Several from Lunamaria and one from Rey, wondering where he was. "I was supposed to be back at the ship an hour ago! Gladys kanchou will kill me!"

"I didn't know you weren't from Orb Shinn-san," Harmony murmured. "If I had realized that, I wouldn't have kept you out so late..."

"No, it's alright Harmony, I had a really good time."

She brightened a little, "Really?"

"Yeah! I really would like to do it again sometime, but with everything that's going on in the world, I don't know when we'll next meet again."

"Oh, that's alright! Do you know when you're leaving Orb? Maybe you can come for a quick visit before you leave."

"I'd like that."

"That's great! I'll message you if we can!" She hugged him suddenly, her voice low and filled with emotion, "You take care of yourself, okay? Be careful Shinn-san."

"You too, Harmony, Kira. I'll miss you guys."

"Goodbye Shinn-san! We'll see you again!" Harmony waved as they parted ways. Shinn smiled and waved back before racing off to the military base and the _Minerva._

"Do you think we should tell him Kira-san? Kira-san?!" she waved her hand in front of Kira's face.

"Huh? Oh... he seems trustworthy enough."

She pouted, "Oh... I see where this is going. You like him!"

"What?!"

"I can tell! You like him, and it's more then a friend. You have just caught the love at first sight bug!"

"You've been reading too many drugstore romances Harmony."

"Maybe, but you like him! Think about it, we have at least a few days before he leaves."

"I'll give it some thought."

* * *

Whew! Finished! That's Phase 1 done and completed, now I just have... thirty-one more to go. I've only finished two phases so far, one and seventeen. I'll go work on another one now. I will finish another, I promise! Must... finish... story... must... finish... story... 

The only other completed phase is Phase 17: The Appearance of Truth, I'm currently working on Phase 20: Reunion.


	2. Phase 2: Meetings of Faith

**A/N:** I gave up on working on phase twenty and instead decided to work on this phase because I felt like it! Neyah! I'm a crazy fangirl! Fear me! But anyways, I was debating whether or not to put a second lemon in this story. The first one is in Phase 4: Behind the Veil, and I'm debating whether or not to put one more in. What do you guys think? Oh wait, maybe I should wait and ASK once I get to the point where I'm thinking of placing it. But here's the thing, for anyone who wants to know, this story WILL have a sequel. I'm already planning it out. I've already got this story planned out, so I will start to work on the sequel once I have finished this one.

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Gundam SEED Destiny, only own Harmony and plot. That's it.

**Dedication: **This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

* * *

**Phase 2: Meetings of Faith**

_We need to meet. War memorial. ASAP._

Shinn's mind flickered back once more to the text message that Harmony had sent him. It was extremely early in the morning, he hadn't expected Harmony to contact him only a mere week after their first meeting, in fact, he hadn't thought he'd be able to see either her or Kira before he left Orb.

* * *

Stepping off of the shuttle, Athrun Zala looked around, spotting the middle-aged man that was swiftly approaching him. Assuming that this man was his guide, Athrun turned to meet him. 

"I know you've come a long way, but I'm not sure that the chairman will be able to meet with you right away. After all, another war has just been announced," the man explained, he led Athrun along the corridors that Athrun knew so well. They arrived in a small lounge. "Please wait here."

Athrun nodded, "Thank you."

* * *

The memorial was exactly as he'd remembered it being. Harmony and Kira stood there waiting for him; Kira was looking out towards the ocean while Harmony was watching out for Shinn. When she spotted him, she called out, "Shinn-san!" And ran over, throwing her arms around his neck in a tight hug. 

She released him, Kira came up behind her. Shinn noticed that there was a sharpness to the sorrow in Kira's eyes, while Harmony's just looked panicked, "I'm sorry that I had to contact you at such short notice; but we've recently heard that Orb intends to join the Earth Alliance!"

"What?!"

Kira looked up to him, amethyst and garnet met, "The Seiran family is pushing for the alliance; they've been known to side with the Earth Alliance on many issues. They're most then sympathetic to their cause; I believe they support it."

"Cagalli-san is obviously trying her best to stop the alliance! I'm sure of it!" Harmony assured, she turned to Shinn. "What we are about to tell you Shinn-san cannot be revealed to anyone else. We're trusting you with our secrets."

"What...? Harmony I-"

"There really isn't much time Shinn-san! Waltfeld-san will be sending a message to the _Minerva_ to inform of this move and advise them to leave Orb! It's-"

"You mean Andrew Waltfeld, the Desert Tiger?"

She gave a wane smile, Kira kept his eyes on Shinn, "You did your research."

"Harmony-san, you mentioned a Ramius-san, and-"

"Kanchou of the _Archangel,_" she held his arm. "We won't be in Orb for much longer either Shinn-san. We're going to leave once the treaty has been finalized. The _Archangel_ is leaving Orb."

"What? The _Archangel_?" Of course Shinn had heard of the battleship; anyone in the military could tell you about it and it's connections to one of the most famous mobile suits of all time, the _Freedom_.

"Here, let's go sit down." She led them over to a bench. Harmony tugged Shinn down to sit beside her, while Kira stood to the side of Shinn. "It's the truth. We really are members of the _Archangel_'s crew. We're both pilots; I pilot a customized Murasame, while Kira-san pilots-"

"The _Freedom_."

Shinn couldn't help the look of shock that spread across his face. His eyes widened and his mouth dropped; Kira was the pilot of the _Freedom_?! The name of the pilot had never been known, although he assumed that the higher ranking officials in Zaft were aware of the pilot's identity.

Immediately, Harmony was trying to alleviate his fears, "If we ever meet in battle, I can promise that neither of us will do you harm. Kira-san likes you Shinn-san," here Shinn blushed and looked at his hands at the implications, "And I do as well. You're like the little brother I never had; and I don't want to see this war hurt you. I want to protect you Shinn-san."

Kira came over and placed a hand on Harmony's shoulder, "Harmony, why don't you go and wait? I'd like to talk to Shinn alone."

She nodded, and stood up, casting a curious glance back at them as she walked away. Kira took her vacated seat. For several long minutes, they just starred out at the sunrise as the light spread across the ocean.

"If Lacus were here, she'd lament over how the flowers will drown..." Kira mentioned. "But even if they do drown, new ones will sprout up to take their place."

"I... I guess... yeah. Wait, you said Lacus? Isn't she in the PLANTs?"

Kira looked to him, a look of surprise on his face, "Lacus lives here, in Orb. We both have since the war ended two years ago. We're staying with Murrue-san and Andrew-san."

A faint stab of jealousy came at Shinn, he tried to ignore it, "Well, there's a Lacus Clyne up in the PLANTs; she's been helping the chairman with calming the people down..."

"That bastard."

Astounded, Shinn turned his head to look at Kira. His face was slightly dark, and a frown had creased his attractive features; Shinn had to stop his scrutiny when his blush became to much for him, and averted his eyes. Unfortunately, Kira had noticed.

Crossing his arms, Kira chanced a glance at Shinn, "I spoke to Athrun before he left for the PLANTs. He's confused, just like he was before. With everyone hiding their motives, I'm not surprised that some people would be confused about what they should be fighting for.

"I still believe what I always have; that the fighting can be resolved through diplomatic means... but that's not always possible when one side only craves for war and the destruction of the other."

"You know Athrun?"

"We've been friends since we were little."

Once again, that jealous stab came back with a vengeance. Shinn ground his teeth in annoyance, but continued on, "He was on board the _Minerva_ with the representative. I met him there."

"Cagalli?"

"Yeah..."

Kira looked back at his hands, "She's been having difficulties ever since her father's death. It's not easy to lead a country when you're only eighteen."

"You know her?"

"We fought together in the last war; eventually, it came out that we're related... she's my sister." Shinn's stomach practically dropped out at that statement. He gaped at the older Coordinator, a faint blush still evident on his cheeks. "Her mindset right now is troubling me, I don't think she'll be able to stop the alliance."

Shinn looked away. He tried to sort through his tumultuous feelings. As he was so engrossed in sorting through them, he didn't notice the odd look that Kira was giving him when he failed to respond to his next statement.

"It's probably Yuna, I know that she'd normally seek Athrun's advise, the guy is a leader by heart; but he's gone now. I think he's most likely going to rejoin Zaft. Although, now that I know there's another Lacus, I'm not sure that I can trust the chairman. Shinn, what do you make of the chairman?"

No response. Kira watched his companion who was obviously deep in thought. Scrutinizing his eyes, Kira noticed how the emotions kept flickering through them. Although he wasn't sure of some of them; he was able to piece together a suspicion of what was going through Shinn's head. Gently, he reached out to touch his cheek. When the younger Coordinator didn't jerk away from the touch, part of his suspicion was confirmed. Determined to find out the full truth, Kira rubbed Shinn's cheek with his thumb; the garnet-eyed teen blushed.

"Listen Shinn, I want to know if you trust me."

He looked up and their eyes locked again, Kira's eyes were sincere. Shinn found himself quickly becoming lost in the violet pools, but rallied himself to piece together a response, "I... I trust you Kira. I trust you."

"I'll be honest with you Shinn; Lacus and I have no romantic relationship. At one point, I was interested in her; but those feelings... I guess I just felt lonely after Fllay died," his other hand came up so that he could cup Shinn's face in both his hands. Shinn clung to every word, his hopes steadily rising. "But she supported me, and we became close friends."

He took a deep breath, "I know that we've only known each other for a short amount of time, Shinn; and that we might never meet again. But... I think that... no, I know that I love you."

Shocked by the confession, Shinn wanted to add his own; but was silenced when Kira's lips descended upon his. The kiss was soft and sweet, but Shinn swore he could feel suppressed passion. Before anything could happen, Kira pulled away.

Slowly drifting back to himself, Shinn reached up slowly to touch his lips and looked back up at Kira. The older Coordinator was truly handsome, the early morning sunlight reflecting off his brown hair, and his violet eyes looked incredibly deep and understanding; lips were kissable soft he recalled and his skin looked smooth. Shinn reached up tentatively to touch his face. His hand cupped his cheek, Kira nuzzled the hand gently.

"I... I love you too Kira."

He leaned up to steal another kiss, this one more passionate then the last.

* * *

Athrun let out a sigh, he'd been waiting for a while now. Approaching the TV, which was reporting the weather in Aprius, he wondered, _If the passwords haven't been changed, I should be able to find out what's going on._

Typing the appropriate sequence in, he was pleasantly surprised to find that the passwords hadn't been changed. A voice reported, "Earth Alliance forces have just breached area three!"

_Starting off with a bang I see._

"We have another enemy approaching from polar orbit! Confirmed two parties of nuclear missiles!"

_What?! Nuclear missiles?! No!_

Athrun stumbled backwards, he heard Yzak's voice shut over the chaos, "Head back! We can't let them hit the PLANTs!"

The door to his left opened, the last thing that Athrun heard over the communication was, "Neutron Stampeder exposed."

Closing his eyes, Athrun entered the hallway beyond. A red Haro bounced over to him, "What?! Haro, why are-"

"Athrun!"

"Lacus?!" he found himself nearly knocked off his feet when she collided with him. When she pulled back, he noted that she definitely was not Lacus. Lacus, for one, would never wear what she was wearing.

"I've been waiting for you to arrive!" she gushed with a bright smile.

"Hello Alex," a new voice greeted. Athrun recognized it as the chairman's.

"Chairman Durandul," he greeted politely. "Who is she?" he indicated the Lacus look-a-like behind him who was giggling. He had the odd feeling that she was ogling his butt.

"Ah, shall we step into my office?" the chairman requested. Athrun nodded and followed him into his office, where he was seated on a couch. He was vaguely surprised at the changes that Durandul had made to it since Patrick Zala had inhabited it. Durandul took a seat across from him, a glass coffee table with a chess set on it between the couches.

"I'm sorry about the long wait," Durandul began. "But I've been rather busy lately."

"I saw the news."

Durandul's eyebrows raised slightly, "Well... then I expect this meeting to be brief."

"The Earth forces launch a nuclear attack almost immediately after declaring another war. What does Zaft, I mean the chairman, intend to do about this?" Athrun asked.

Durandul frowned and took a sip of his tea, "For now, they've retreated to the moon. This is just the beginning." He sighed, "I'm under pressure to strike back, but if I cave into the people's desires, we can be certain of another full scale conflict, which I would rather like to avoid if at all possible."

Athrun was vaguely aware of a news report happening in the background, the chairman had left his screen on.

"However," Durandul continued. "The nuclear assault was halted by the Neutron Stampeder. Although, I suppose it is only a matter of time until they decide to strike again."

"We interrupt this news report for a special announcement," the woman on screen was saying. Athrun turned his attention to it.

The girl from before was suddenly on screen, she announced loud and clear, "This is Lacus Clyne. Please listen to me!"

Athrun was stunned. He stared as she continued her speech, "The events of Junius Seven and the declaration of war by the Earth Alliance are both troubling events. We must calm down before ordering for any action; if we let ourselves be controlled by our anger, we will only have another war!

"The Supreme Council is doing their best to find a solution to this catastrophe. I beseech you all to support the council and chairman Durandul during this difficult time."

Durandul had stood up and walked over to a door during this time, "You can laugh if you want. Her name is Meer Campbell; that's my Lacus Clyne."

"What...?"

"It may be a dirty trick, but I am in need of her power," Durandul said. "I am also in need of yours. Follow me please."

Athrun fell into step behind the chairman. Eventually they came into a hangar, where the chairman stopped. The lights came on, revealing a mobile suit.

"This is...!"

"ZGMF-X23 Savior," Durandul responded. "While it's capabilities may differ, it was developed along with those three stolen machines." He paused and turned to look at Athrun, "This is for you."

Athrun was stunned, his response was, "You want me to return to the battlefield."

"This is your choice; you can give me your answer at any time. Until you come to your decision, I'll have security sent to your hotel as body guards."

"Thank you chairman."

Meer rushed over to greet him once again when he exited into the lobby. She latched herself onto his arm and whispered, "I'm Meer, but when we're in public like this please call me Lacus!"

"Uhh..."

"Why don't you two go have dinner? I'm sure that will give you two time to talk," Durandul instructed with a smile. Meer beamed back before dragging Athrun off with giving him time to respond.

The two were seated a secluded table that looked out over the city. Athrun gazed out for a few minutes before turning his attention back to Meer.

"Well? What did you think of my performance? Was I good? Did I look just like her? How did I sound?" Meer gushed out. When Athrun didn't respond for several long minutes, her face feel, and her voice got small and depressed, "Was I really that bad...?"

Athrun rushed to correct her, "No no! You were quite good! I couldn't tell the difference!" The last past was a bit of a lie, but he didn't feel like being completely honest with Meer about it.

"Really?"

"Yeah, you were just like her..." he looked up to finally meet her eyes. "How did you come to start doing this Meer?"

She looked serious, maybe a little sad, when she began, "They came one day when they heard how much I sounded like Lacus-san. They said that the chairman needed my help. I was so happy to be able to help!" she looked downright depressed now, "As Meer, I can't help anyone, but as Lacus-san, I can help lots of people. I wanted to help," she smiled and gave a little shrug, "Even if it's just for the time being, I'm game."

Athrun didn't respond, but looked out the window. Meer watched his moves closely, then spoke up, "I know this might be surprising, but your engagement to Lacus-san was never formally broken. People don't know about it; so outside this room we have to pretend that I'm still your finance."

"... I guess..."

"I really hope that we can be friends, Athrun," she added. "I don't have romantic interest in you; I met someone before that I hope to one day settle down with."

This information surprised Athrun, "You-you have?"

"Yes! He's really nice! Promise not to tell the chairman? He wouldn't approve of it, and if it got out it could ruin me and him as well..."

Athrun gave her a reassuring smile, "Your secret's safe with me." Meer beamed back at him before returning to her menu.

"Thank you Athrun; I'm sure that you'd like him too."

* * *

Athrun sighed. He had only met with the chairman earlier that day, but the discussion and his thoughts on the whole matter continued to echo around in his head. He gazed absent-absentmindedly out his window. The dinner he'd been forced to go on with Meer had been a little unsettling and tiring. He thought about going to visit everyone's graves. Yeah, he'd like to do that... 

There was a knock at his door. Expecting it to be the security that Durandul had sent checking in, Athrun opened the door. He was shocked to find Yzak and Dearka standing there, both in casual clothes.

"We got pulled from the front lines just so we could babysit you," Yzak told him snappishly.

"Yzak! Dearka!"

"So what brings you back here?" Dearka asked, defusing what could've become a rather loud and volatile argument.

"I came to meet with the chairman. And I was actually planning to go out right now." He stepped out past them, both turned.

"You are NOT dragging me shopping Zala!"

Athrun rolled his eyes, Yzak hadn't changed much.

Later saw the three comrades in a car, Athrun in the back with three bouquets of flowers on his lap. The group headed out for the cemetery.

Once they'd paid their respects to Athrun's mother and Rusty, the trio stopped in front of Nicol's grave. Athrun placed the last bouquet upon it and saluted, as did Yzak and Dearka.

"I should've been executed," Yzak stated. "If the chairman hadn't stepped in, I would be just like them; tried as a war criminal."

"Yzak..."

"You have the power to make a difference Athrun. Why not use that power? Just don't go stealing my authority!"

Dearka shot Athrun a sympathetic look. Athrun shrugged his shoulders in response; he was half-right. Yzak had matured, but he was still the same in some areas.

As Athrun settled down into bed later that night, he found that he'd finally come to a decision.

* * *

Be happy! I finally finished phase two at around one thirty in the morning. The reason this phase took me so long to write was because I wasn't sure of what I wanted everyone to say and what exactly I wanted to put in it. I actually had to edit parts of it because I wanted to build on Meer's character (both she and Lacus are my favorite female characters; including Stellar); and I thought that it would be an interesting scene to write. 

Parts of this chapter I had to reference to my Gundam SEED Destiny manga (and I don't mean _The Edge_, I don't own that, wish I did though); and others were referenced directly from the show.

And as well, no complaining about my time line. I know that love normally takes longer to form, but Shinn's leaving Orb soon, and there is such thing as 'love at first sight', I've experianced it myself. And no complaining about the length of time the Minerva was in Orb. The damage would take time to repair, so I estimated on it, and decided the briefest time I could afford was a week.

Once again, I have no idea when phase three will be finished. But I have finished phases eighteen, twenty-one and twenty-two. I'll probably work some more on this story tomorrow, as it's REALLY late right now. Please read and review! It helps keep me wanting to continue this story. And look! This chapter is really long!

Night.

Kat.


	3. Phase 3: A Soldier's Resolve

**A/N:** Well, I finally did finish up and publish the second phase. Now I'm down to working on the third phase; surprisingly, I'm now trying to work on these phases in order so I can publish them more quickly and so that you guys can get a look at them. I hope that you guys are happy with the lengths of the chapters. Please give me more reviews... I live for them. They make my day.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam SEED Destiny; I only own Harmony and the plot. That's it, so no suing me.

**Dedication: **This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

* * *

**Phase 3: A Soldier's Resolve**

Lunamaria stalked along the corridors of the _Minerva_ towards the cafeteria, hoping to corner Shinn there. The _Impulse_'s pilot had been acting strange ever since he'd returned from their first excersion into Orb. Determined to get to the bottom of the issue, she had tried to enlist Rey and Meyrin in her endeavor, but both had declined and scurried off (in Meyrin's case).

Shinn was poking at his food, a faraway look in his eyes. He didn't even notice when Luna plopped down across from him with her tray.

"Shhhiiiinnnn..." she called softly, waving her hand in front of his face.

"Ah! Oh, it's just you Luna," he muttered, returning to his food, which he continued to poke at; occaisonally taking a bite. Luna pouted, he wasn't going to get out of this that easily!

"Listen Shinn," Luna cut straight to the chase. "What's wrong with you? You've been acting funny ever since we left Orb. And you still haven't given Gladys kanchou a reason for why you were so late that night!"

Shinn, realizing that Luna wouldn't stop until she got a satisfactory answer. Quickly putting a lie together, "I... I ran into an old family friend in Orb."

"I didn't know you had any friends in Orb..."

"She's an eldery woman... she brought her daughter to the monument," Shinn lied fluently. "But they insisted on catching up so..." he turned a little pink; apparently Luna took this the wrong way.

She gave him a knowing smirk, "Ohh... I see, you like the daughter. What's her name? Is she pretty? Is she nice? Are we going to get to meet her?"

Fed up with the probing, Shinn stood up suddenly, slamming his fists on the table, "I don't! And it's none of your business!" All eyes were on the angry pilot as he stormed out of the cafeteria; leaving a stunned and slightly hurt Luna behind.

Shinn walked right by the shooting range, Rey was there, which meant that their room was empty. Heading straight there, Shinn opened the door. He wondered whether or not Harmony and Kira would risk contacting him. Mayu's cell phone, which he'd adopted as his own, he flicked it open; surprised that he had several messages.

"_Hey Shinn! It's Harmony! I hope you're doing okay, I heard about what happened with that ambush. I know you probably won't believe this, but Cagalli's really sorry about it. Anyways, we're doing fine; I hope you get this message soon! Call me back soon so we can catch up!"_

The beep indicated that the message ended. Shinn pulled it away from his ear for a moment; lounging back on his bed, he mused over the message. _'Cagalli's really sorry...'_ He had to force himself to quell the rising anger at that, but then the revelation of her being Kira's sister, dulled it. Shaking his head, he'd prefer an apology in person, but this would do for now.

"_Shinn? I hope you get this message and call back. Listen, I'm really sorry if I rushed you at Orb; but since you were leaving so soon, I just thought... that it might be best if I did express how I felt about you._

"_Aside from that, the situation here in Orb has gone downhill. I'm glad Andrew-san managed to warn you guys in time. If you have anything that you want to talk about, you can call me. Just leave a message if I don't answer. Love you."_

Shinn gave a small smile at the message, he hit save, and wondered about the messages. Deciding he'd call Kira, then if Harmony wanted to talk to him, she could use Kira's phone. Using the speed dial shortcut he set up for it, the ring tone echoed in his ear.

"_Kira Yamato here."_

"Kira?"

"_Shinn! You got my message?"_

"Yeah, and there's no need for you to apologize; I'm actually really glad that you told me. If you hadn't... I would be spending my time wondering how you felt about me... and maybe I would've made some bad choices. But thanks Kira."

"_I'm glad Shinn. You're doing well?"_

"Yeah, I'm fine. We had a scuffle with the Earth Alliance, but we managed to get out of it."

"_I heard. You're an excellant pilot, Shinn. The Orb military's been talking about you and the Impulse. Most don't know who you are as the pilot, but they talk about you indirectly."_

"Oh. What about you? How are you doing?"

"_Right now? The Seiran's are searching out any Coordinators who might pose a threat to their regime and their treaty with the Earth Alliance. I'm hiding now; I might have to leave Orb, but..."_

"What? What happened Kira?!"

"_Well... I wouldn't trust Durandul if I were you. Just after you left, Coordinators from the special forces division of Zaft... they were after Lacus. They even had their mobile suits; the only way I could stop them was by piloting the Freedom."_

"Kira..."

"_I shouldn't dull you with the details; needless to say, it's more then likely that we'll meet again on the battlefield. Shinn I... I won't hurt you. At the very least, I won't hurt you... in fact, I'll try to avoid fighting you... if I must, I'll just disarm your mobile suit."_

"I... I understand Kira... I don't want to hurt you either. You're really all that I have left."

"_Harmony wants to talk to you; I love you Shinn."_

"I love you too Kira."

"_Oh my god! Hi Shinn!"_

He smiled, "Hey Harmony."

"_I'm so glad that you're alright! I mean, I knew that you'd be alright; but that didn't stop me from worrying! You're stationed on the Minerva? Sure, I figured that out. But you could've told us that! What, you on't trust us?"_

"N-no! I trust you two! I just... I just never thought... you never asked..."

"_I'm just kidding Shinn! Soo... you and Kira, huh?"_

"How did you?!"

"_You two picked a lovely place to have a little battle of the tongues, I could see you two from where I was waiting! Now **that**, was the hottest thing I've ever seen!"_

"You... you don't have anything against it?"

"_Naw! I saw that coming! I mean, the way you two would keep sending each other those looks I could just tell that it was a matter of time before you two made a move on each other! I just had too, give you guys a little helpful nudge! Plus, I'd already figured out by then that you were stationed on board the Minerva so... you guys didn't have a lot of time._

"_Yeah, yeah; I know I meddled! But I don't like seeing people be unhappy, and who knew when you two would see each other again? So I... I just felt that I had too..."_

"So you arranged that meeting?"

"_Duh, Kira would never do it; so I took matters into my own hands. That meeting was not only for the truth to come out, but also so you two could come to terms with your feelings for each other."_

"Well, thanks Harmony. I guess I owe you one."

"_That's okay! So where are you guys headed now? Or is that classified?"_

"Diokia."

"_I see... listen Shinn, Kira's probably already warned you, but be careful around Durandul. If anything happens, call one of us immediately; preferably Kira first. Oh! I have to go Shinn! Meeting! I'll talk to you later! Bye!"_

She hung up; and Shinn snapped his phone shut. Smiling, he rolled over onto his side and curled up. He wanted this war to end... he wanted it to end so badly. He wanted it to end so that he could be with Kira.

He closed his eyes and fell asleep.

The _Minerva_ stopped to resupply and rest at Carpentaria. The crew members had been allowed to wander around the base until the resupplying was completed. Shinn was wondering around the dock that the _Minerva_ was docked at, when he saw a red shuttle-like mobile suit heading towards the _Minerva_.

Racing to the hangar to see what it was about, Shinn skidded into the hangar of the _Minerva_, calling out to Luna, "Did a new mobile suit land?!"

"Shinn..."

He spotted the pilot, and his eyes widened and jaw nearly dropped. It was Athrun Zala. Shinn would've blurted out a greeting, or something indicating that he knew about him; but he stopped himself. Instead, he noticed the Faith insignia on Athrun's pilot suit. Curious, but holding his tongue, Shinn managed a salute.

Luna gave him a funny look, but otherwise ignored him. Athrun returned their salute, before asking, "Could you tell me where the kanchou is?"

"She's in her office I believe, sir," Luna responded. Athrun nodded before he turned to find Talia, briefcase in hand. Luna immediately turned on Shinn, "You were going to say something crude to him weren't you?!"

"N-no!" Shinn managed to stutter back. Luna could be downright scary when mad. "Luna I-"

"Don't say anything that could jeoprodize your career Shinn! Athrun-san is a member of Faith! He's higher-ranked then us, and a far-better pilot and marksmen! Remember that Shinn before you go picking any fights with him!"

Shinn glared at his friend, "Yeah, yeah... whatever you say Luna. You're only so defensive of him because you like him!"

Luna blushed before storming away from Shinn to her own room, or somewhere where he wasn't. Shinn shrugged before going to find something to occupy the time until they departed for Diokia.

"We need information," Cagalli was saying. "And to do that, we're going to have to make a move. Where's the nearest Zaft base?"

Harmony looked up, "That would be Carpentaria; but there's no way we'd be able to enter there without them finding out about Lacus. Besides Carpentaria, the closest base would be the one at Diokia."

"Diokia?"

"There's a town there," Lacus added. "It would be much easier to slip into the town from there and see if we can gather any information from there. Of course, we'd have to have the_ Archangel _land somewhere where it would be hidden."

"But I doubt that Lacus could easily enter the town without being recognized," Kira told them. "Having Cagalli go would also be risky, but not as risky as Lacus going."

Murrue frowned, "So are we heading to Diokia?"

"Definitely," Cagalli answered. "But who should we send?"

"If... if it's not too much trouble, I'd like to go," Harmony whispered. "There's... an old labratory near Diokia that I'd like to investigate..."

Kira placed his hand on her shoulder, "I'll go with Harmony to make sure that she's safe. Is that alright Cagalli? Lacus?"

The two women nodded. Harmony smiled, "Should we stay the night there? I'd like to go to the labratory, but we should gather information first. So, we could gather information the first day and then head out to the labratory the next day."

Lacus worried her lower lip with her teeth, "I don't know... I'd be worried about you two spending too long in Zaft inhabited territory..."

"Don't worry, Lacus-san; Kira-san and I will be fine," Harmony reassured. "We'll be careful."

"Alright then."

"Set course for Diokia!" Murrue ordered the bridge.

* * *

Ugh, this phase took longer then I would've liked; but I finished it. I have to admit, however, that I don't like this phase as much as I liked the last two phases, but I'll deal with it. Now, however, I get to FINALLY work on the phase that I have been super excited to work on!

Next phase is contains a lemon, so I'll be posting an edited version here; for the full version, I'll put a link up in my profile for the NC-17 version on AdultFanfiction (Media Miner is a retard; screws the formatting up because I'm on a Mac, or some other reason.). Besides the lemon, I have to edit and rewrite parts of phase twenty-one. I've changed a few details for the story, so I need to edit it to reflect that.

Thank you for reading. Please review!

Kat.


	4. Phase 4: Behind the Veil

**A/N: **I'm extremely sorry if the last phase seemed a little rushed... I was exhausted and wanting to get it out as soon as I could because I knew that this one would take me much longer to write, and I was right. I might not have finished my earlier ambition of finishing this story before summer was over; but I think that four phases of this length in two months is good enough for me. Normally, I can take about two months to even get one chapter out; heh, life interferes. For those of you reading this on and who want the unedited version, then look me up on AFF, my pen name there is Viridian Kat, this story has the same title there.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam SEED Destiny or its characters; they're the property of Bandai and others. I only own Harmony and the plot; so don't sue me, ya won't get much.

**Dedication:** This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

* * *

**Phase 4: Behind the Veil**

"So we have the next couple days off," Luna stated; Meyrin and Shinn behind her. They were wearing civilian clothes and were walking towards a small cafe. "What are we going to do with all this time? I know how about we go shopping?" Luna turned so she could walk backwards to face them.

"Ah!" Luna had walked right into another young woman, the paper bag of groceries spilling all over the sidewalk.

"Oh no!" Meyrin immediately knelt down and began helping her to gather the split items, Shinn also knelt to help. As the young woman looked up, Shinn recognized her; she recognized him as well.

"Shinn-san?"

"Harmony-san?"

"Wait, you two know each other?" Luna asked as the trio stood, Harmony had her groceries back in the bag and in her arms.

"Yes," Harmony responded. "We met in Orb."

"What are you doing here Harmony? I thought you were still in Orb," Shinn asked; a little worry slipping into his voice.

Harmony frowned, "Well I was but... when the treaty was finalized I had to leave to avoid prosecution by the Seirans..." she sighed, "I managed to sneak out of the country; and made my way here. It's not safe for a Coordinator in any countries that are occupied by the Earth Alliance."

The group continued towards the cafe, Luna jumped in, "So Harmony-san... are you and Shinn an item?"

"Wh-what?! I-I... I would never!" Harmony huffed, her face a stunning crimson color. Shinn turned a similar color, and looked at his feet. "Of course not! Shinn-san's a nice person and all! But he's definitely not my type."

Shinn flushed at the compliment, but Harmony continued, "What about you two? I'm sorry but I don't know your names."

"Lunamaria Hawke, but I prefer Luna."

"Meyrin Hawke."

"Luna-san, Meyrin-san," Harmony smiled. "But Luna-san, what's your relationship with Shinn-san?"

"We're friends," Shinn cut in. Luna huffed and crossed her arms, but said nothing else. Meyrin smiled at the older girl.

"H-Harmony-san? Are you staying in Diokia?" she stuttered, obviously shy round the new person.

"I'm not sure; I only just arrived here yesterday evening. A friend and I are staying at a hotel until we figure out what we're going to do," she responded. Shinn watched her carefully, amazed at how easily she could lie. He very much wanted to know the actual reason she was here, but held back from asking until they were in private.

"Oh, I see..."

Harmony smiled again at the younger girl, "Meyrin-san, I wouldn't worry so much about me. You're in Zaft aren't you?"

"H-how did you-?!"

She winked and nudged Shinn, "I figured it out after he let it slip back in Orb that his kanchou would be missing him! I'm not an idiot; I realized that he was in the military." Her tone grew serious, "But I do hope that you three will be okay. War takes too many casualties, and I would rather that no one else I know be among them."

"What do you mean? Did you lose someone in the last war?"

"I... I lost my sister..." she mumbled, looking depressed. "When we were little, she was taken by Blue Cosmos after our parents died... I don't know what happened to her after that..."

"I'm sorry to hear that..."

A look of pure determination settled over Harmony's face, "It's my hope that I'll find her someday; I made her a promise that I intend to keep."

The afternoon passed with lighter conversation; Shinn noticed how easily both Luna and Meyrin accepted Harmony, speaking to her about silly girl things. They giggled and talked in hushed whispers. Eventually, the two sisters excused themselves and left; leaving Shinn and Harmony alone at the cafe.

"So, Harmony-san, what are you doing here?" Shinn asked in a lower voice.

Harmony's face turned serious, if not a touch sad, "There's a lab nearby... we needed information anyways, so Kira-san and I came here to see what we could learn. I'm hoping to be able to visit that old lab to see if I can find anything out about my sister..."

"Kira's here?"

"Yeah, I'm not exactly sure where he slipped off to; but he's here somewhere," she responded. "Said he'd drop by this cafe and meet up with me before we head back to the hotel."

"Hey, Harmony-san, I was just wondering..."

"Oh? What is it Shinn-san?"

"How did you two get into town? Didn't they run a background check on the two of you?" Shinn wasn't perfectly acquainted with the security that Diokia's borders had, but he knew the gist of them.

Harmony crossed her arms, "Kira brought a motorcycle with him. They didn't run background checks on us; we brought our Orb civilian identification with us, we managed to pass ourselves off as refuges."

"And they didn't stop you?"

"They wanted to run a background check on me; thought there was something suspicious about me," Harmony elaborated. "I managed to tell them that I was an immigrant from the PLANTs to Orb, and that because of the alliance with the Earth Forces and Blue Cosmos; that I had to flee Orb. It was a lame story; but they bought it and let us in."

Leaning back in his chair, Shinn and Harmony caught up on what they'd missed. Harmony told him a little more about Lacus and a few of her friends on board the _Archangel_. She even talked a little about the last war; talking about the battles she'd fought, friends lost.

She even spoke of her sister; Stellar, who she hoped to find one day.

"Stellar's the most innocent person I've ever met. She's innocent and beautiful. I love her dearly, her innocence... but after our parents died, she was so terrified of death," Harmony's voice was low, choked with emotion. "We weren't too old, so I guess it was to be expected... she was, well, she wasn't any older then five, and I was eight. We were left all alone; we were in an orphanage. That's where... Blue Cosmos took her..."

She sobbed, "They... they dragged her out of there... kicking and screaming. With me yelling at them, hitting them; begging them to take me instead, to leave Stellar here. I promised to protect her after our parents died... and I failed..."

Reaching over, Shinn placed his hand gently over hers and gave it a squeeze, "If it makes you feel any better, I... I lost my parents in the last war... at Orb."

"You... you never talk about them, what were they like?" Harmony looked at him, her dark magenta eyes on him. Shinn had never noticed her eye color, but now that he looked; they looked magenta, the shade changing with her mood. "Of course... you, I mean, there's no need to tell me; but it makes you feel better."

"Hey," came a quiet voice from behind them. Shinn turned, seeing Kira behind him; he gave a small smile. Harmony smiled gently, her eyes still moist and dark with sorrow, but there was a happy light in them. "Shinn, love, how are you?" He leaned down, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder before placing a light, gentle kiss on his temple.

"I'm fine Kira..." he mumbled, embarrassed at the show of public affection. Kira smiled and slid into the seat beside him. "What about you?"

"Perfectly fine," Kira responded, pulling Shinn as close as he could despite the uncomfortable wrought iron cafe chairs. "But I'll say... I was rather worried about you. Especially with that ambush..."

"But I'm fine! Not a scratch on me!" Shinn objected.

Harmony was smiling serenely, "It's astonishing how much you two can act like you've been together for longer then you actually have."

Shinn blushed, and Kira smiled. She continued to smile, "But Shinn-san, about your family... I... I would really like to hear about them..."

Catching onto the conversation that he'd interrupted, Kira's face fell into a frown, "Your family Shinn? ... I would also like to hear about them."

Looking between the two, Shinn let out a heavy sigh and leaned further into Kira for support, "They were... wonderful." He gave a wistful smile at the thought of his family. "My father was a hard-worker, but a family man. He loved us all and would give his life for us..."

His voice trailed off, he could feel the pain building in himself, "And then... my mother... stayed at home. She looked after Mayu and I, loved us, cared for us; we were her life. Mayu... she was everything... innocent, lovable... my little sister was everything to me." He smiled up at Kira, "Till I met you of course."

Eyes fell to the table, and he shifted uncomfortably, "... they all died. At the battle... for Orb..." He looked up to Kira, "You were there... I know you were."

Vaguely, Kira remembered a family... a family fleeing through the woods while he'd been fighting _Calamity_. He'd worried that in the fight they'd might be hit, he'd tried to lure the other Gundam away. But...

"I'm sorry Shinn..." he murmured. "I saw your family... but _Calamity_ wouldn't follow. I tried to lure him away... but-"

Soft fingers were over his lips, Shinn smiled up at him softly, "There's no need to apologize Kira... even I don't know what happened, and I was there... but you just said that you'd tried to protect them... protect me... and, I don't think it was you who killed them." His smile didn't even falter, "I won't believe it. If it weren't for Blue Cosmos... none of this wouldn't have happened; and I would never have met you. So... maybe that's a good thing?"

Kira returned the smile, hugging him tightly, "Thank you Shinn. I'm glad it turned out this way."

"Yes Shinn-san, everything happens for a reason. Perhaps this is destiny; you two were met to meet and fall in love," Harmony theorized. "But then, I don't think destiny is fixed; the choices you have made have led us here; and led you two to be together. Destiny is freedom, and freedom is destiny."

"I'd like to think that," Shinn returned, shifting closer to Kira. "And I'm glad of the choices that I've made... now that I've found where they've led me."

Standing, the trio made their way out of the cafe. It was late in the evening, and Shinn felt more content then he had been in a few months; not since Kira and he had shared their first kiss had he felt this way. Harmony smiled at them, "I have something I'd like to check. I'll meet you back at the hotel?"

"What? Where are you going?" Shinn was confused; where could Harmony be going?

Almost sensing his apprehension, she smiled reassuringly at him, "I'll be fine; I just want to see if I can gather some information about the laboratory nearby." She flashed him a grin, then her thigh, Shinn saw the gun holstered there. "Don't worry Shinn-san," her tone was more serious now. "I have combat training; I will be fine."

And with that, she swept off down the street, disappearing around a corner. Shinn watched her go, before an arm sliding around his waist, holding him close brought him out of it, "Kira!"

Kira raised an eyebrow at him, mirth playing in his amethyst eyes, "Well, do you want me to give you a lift back to the base, or would you like to spend the night with me?"

Turning bright red, Shinn stuttered, "W-well I-I'd..." He whispered out his answer, "I'd really like to spend the night with you... if that's okay."

"Quite," Kira responded. "So, love, ever ridden a motorcycle before?"

"Yes, I have," Shinn responded, hanging off Kira's arm; feeling a bit like a ditzy girl. Kira smiled and led him to a sleek, black motorcycle.

He held out a helmet to Shinn, "Here. Put that on." Taking it, Shinn slid it on as Kira slid his own on, sliding the visor down. He held out his hand out, "Shall we?"

Giving Kira his hand, Kira helped him onto the bike behind him. Automatically, he wrapped his arms around Kira's torso, resting his helmet-clad head against Kira's back. Gunning up the motorcycle, they shot off down the road. It wasn't so late that there was no traffic, so they couldn't speed through the streets; but Kira managed to keep up a decent speed.

The evening air in Diokia was mild, but with a slight chill. Shinn tightened his arms around Kira, a shiver running down his back, goose flesh rising in its wake. He should have brought a jacket; but then, he hadn't expected to be out so late.

Pulling into the parking lot, Kira parked the bike and helped Shinn off the bike. Removing the helmet, Shinn shivered, Kira immediately wrapped his arm around Shinn.

"Are you cold?" he held the door open for Shinn, and followed him inside. Taking his young love's hand, Kira led him through the lobby and towards the elevator. "Elevator or stairs?"

"Elevator's fine."

Pressing the 'up' button, Kira turned to face him, "_Minerva_'s here, isn't it?"

"Yeah; I wouldn't be here otherwise," Shinn responded, then, as they stepped into the elevator, "Harmony-san told me a lot... and I think... I think I can understand what you were fighting for."

An arm wound around his waist, pulling him against Kira's side, his arms automatically went around Kira's waist to hug him, "It's the truth... and even though I understand it; and believe in it... I can't leave Zaft... not when my friends are there. So, I'd like to spend as much time with you as I can; outside of battle."

"And I'm fine with that," Kira responded as they got out on the fourth floor. "As long as I do get to spend time with you."

Nuzzling Kira's neck, Shinn practically tackled him to the floor once they were inside; door swing shut behind them, "Ha! I caught you!"

Arms came up to grab his waist, and he found himself effectively pinned to the ground; his hands clenched Kira's shoulders, "I don't think so," Kira purred with a smirk. "You belong to me."

Playing the same game, Shin slid his arms up to twine around Kira's neck, "But then... who do you belong to?"

A small gasp escaped Shinn's lips as Kira pressed hot, open-mouthed kisses along his jawline and neck; biting gently down at the crook of his neck, "I suppose... that I'd belong to you..."

Tilting his head to the side to give Kira better access, he was amazed at how quickly he was becoming aroused. Sure, he'd experimented on his own, but normally it took more... _stimulation_ to get it up. Shoving that aside, he tried to focus on what Kira was doing.

Hands slid up under his shirt, eventually pushing it up and over his head. Immediately Kira pressed a hot searing kiss against his lips. Tongue ran along his lower lip, teeth nipping at it; a silent request for entrance, which was eagerly granted. Arching up into Kira's touch, he groaned into the kiss as the smart fingers tweaked at his nipples; causing them harden.

Kira's tongue was quickly memorizing his mouth and tastes; the fiery kiss slowly turned into a sensual war. Soon, they were forced to break for air; Kira pulled back to look into Shinn's lust tinted eyes which were half-closed. His lips were parted, a mix of their saliva glistened on his lips from their heated exchange; his breathing was heavy.

Unable to keep the smirk from his face, Kira whispered into his ear, "Do you know how seductive you look right now?"

A breathy answer, "I... have an idea... a-ah..." Kira lightly bit down on his earlobe, before once more trailing kisses down along his neck, placing one on the slowly darkening flesh at the crook of his neck; before descending further to his collar bone.

Shinn could barely think as Kira continued his ministrations; all he could focus on was his warm mouth and tongue and his talented fingers which were causing _**very**_ pleasurable sensations to arise in him. He arched upwards, offering more; only to be pushed back down. He could feel Kira smile against his collar bone.

Realizing that his love was still fully clothed, he tugged at the shoulders of his shirt, and whimpered when he couldn't get it off. Propping his chin up on Shinn's collar bone, Kira looked up with him, amusement in his amethyst eyes, "Patience Shinn."

Pouting, Shinn tried to get it off again, "But I don't want to be patient! I want this shirt off _**now**_!" He pulled on it again, only to have Kira pull away from him; straddling his hips as he pulled his shirt up and over his shoulders and tossed it aside.

_Hot damn... he's gorgeous,_ was the only thing that Shinn could think of when he saw the lean expanse of toned muscle that was Kira's chest and stomach. Feeling a little envious (Shinn had a similar build, but he was much more slender), he tentatively reached out and ran his hand down Kira's torso, stopping when he met the waistline of his pants.

"Maybe we should move to the bed," Kira whispered, breaking the silence. Wordlessly, Shinn nodded, unable to take his eyes off the bare skin in front of him. Strong arms looped around him, and he quickly wrapped his legs around slim hips as Kira picked him up off the floor and carried him to the bed.

When Kira sat down, it was Shinn now who straddled his thighs; dark garnet orbs blazing in the darkness with desire, a reverence. His touches were shy, almost innocent in their nature. A question lingered on Kira's tongue that begged to be asked.

"Shinn, are you a virgin?"

Even in the dim light, Kira could see the bright red blush that spread across Shinn's face and neck. He stuttered out an answer, "W-well I..." A quiet murmur, "... yes..." Embarrassed red eyes looked up to meet his own; Kira smiled reassuringly at him.

Rallying, Shinn reached out once again. He marveled at the difference in their skin tones; he was pale, while Kira's held a healthy sun-kissed glow. Lifting his other hand, he nervously tried to imitate what Kira had done earlier to his nipples; the groan that escaped the older Coordinator's lips indicated that he was doing the right thing.

Gently, he kissed Kira's throat; biting down on the side. A surprised gasp, followed by another groan as he soothed the flesh with his tongue. His mouth trailed lower, leaving what he was sure would be red marks by morning along Kira's torso, stopping when he felt a hand ghost up under his chin, guiding it back for another kiss.

* * *

**Insert lemon here.**

* * *

Snuggling up against Kira, Shinn's eyes were hazy and a pale pink blush was splotched across his cheeks. His mind fading to sleep, as he curled up to Kira; the others arms wrapping around him after pulling the covers up around them, he murmured, "I love you Kira..." Dimly, he heard Kira's response. 

"I love you too Shinn."

* * *

Dear god I cannot write smut like this all that often. This took me about... two hours to write in its entirety and I was up till around three AM finishing it. So now I'm going to sleep, because I have stuff to do tomorrow and I'd like sleep. Yep. Sounds nice. Good night y'all. Please leave me some comments; they'd be very much appreciated. 

Kat.


	5. Phase 5: Unwanted Advances

**A/N:** Whew, so I did take the tiniest of breaks from this fanfiction after the last chapter, but now I'm back on track. I'd actually like to know whether or not you guys actually appreciate this story (thank you to my twelve reviewers), so please, I beg of you, leave me a review! They're part of my motivation! Tell me anything, anything at all about the story! I want to hear what people think of it.  
**WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS MATERIAL OF A SEXUAL, NON-CONSENSUAL NATURE. ALSO, THERE IS SOME MENTION OF SEXUAL ACTIVITIES AND MINOR DESCRIPTIONS. IF THIS SORT OF MATERIAL OFFENDS YOU, PLEASE SKIM OVER THE PARTS; YOU DO NOT HAVE TO READ THEM IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO. I HAVE GIVEN YOU ADEQUATE WARNING.  
Disclaimer:** Gundam SEED Destiny is the property of Bandai, Hajime Yatate, and Yoshiyuki Tomino. I own Harmony and the plot; that's it.  
**Dedication:** This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

**Phase 5: Unwanted Advances**

  
Sunlight streamed in through the slightly parted curtains. Shinn groaned snuggled closer to Kira; trying to block out the light. He heard shuffling across the room; confused he raised his head and blinked blearily. Looking over to the source of the noise; he spotted Harmony coming out of the bathroom, completely dressed. He turned bright red, suddenly grateful for the blanket.

Harmony smiled and rolled her eyes. She pointed at the blanket, and than her eyes; which she covered. Shinn took that to mean that she hadn't seen anything. He ducked his head back down as she left; closing the door softly behind her; he dimly heard the lock click.

Deciding to see if he could get a little more sleep, Shinn returned his head to its resting place on Kira's shoulder. The older Coordinator's arms were still wrapped loosely around him, providing warmth and comfort. Shinn gave a small smile before drifting off into a light sleep.

* * *

  
Lunamaria poked her head into Rey and Shinn's deserted room; she frowned, puzzled. Where could Shinn be? Leaving the empty room, she wondered if perhaps the moody pilot had gone for a walk about the base; or had gone back out into the town to explore a little. But than, there was always the possibility that he'd never come back from the town the day before.

Shaking her head to clear her head a little, Luna could only hope that Shinn returned soon. After all, they had a meeting with the chairman at noon...  


* * *

  
"Shinn, Shinn love wake up."

Opening his eyes so they were mere slits, Shinn yawned and gazed lazily up at his lover, "Morning." Kira smiled down at him.

"Looks like someone was tired," he teased, laughing and rolling away as Shinn tried to slap him playfully. Propping himself up over Shinn, Kira smiled and kissed him softly. "Come on, I think it's late enough." Tilting his head to the side, Shinn made out the digital display on the clock on the night stand; it read 9:22.

"Mmm... it's not that late though..."

"No; but Harmony says that there's a concert arranged for later this morning," Kira frowned. "It seems that the fake Lacus is putting on a concert here to raise moral. I'd like to see what this one looks like."

Shinn frowned as well, "Well, the crew members seem to appreciate her look a lot..."

Kira leaned down to rest his forehead against Shinn's, "And what do you think?"

"Me? Well, if you ever try to dress like her; I'll need a LOT of Kleenex." He leaned up and kissed Kira's nose gently. "But I like how you dress; don't go changing it on me."

Kira smiled and rolled off of him once more, "Would you like to come to this concert with me?"

"You mean, like on a date?"

"If you want to think of it that way; than yes." Shinn leaped up and tackled Kira; throwing his arms around his neck. Kira stumbled a little; but kept his balance, his arms wrapped around Shinn.

"Yes! I'd love to go out with you!"

Kira smiled and untangled himself from Shinn's arms, but not before stealing another kiss, "Get dressed than, it'll be starting soon."

Smiling to beat all hell, Shinn gathered his clothes from the floor; ducking into the bathroom to shower quickly first. Waking up with your ass still caked in biological fluids is not exactly a pleasant feeling, before getting dressed. Kira had pulled on his own clothes by the time Shinn exited the bathroom. Smiling, Kira held his hand out, which Shinn immediately took, smiling as well.

The couple left their hotel room; making sure it was locked, before joining Harmony in the lobby.

"The happy couple finally up!" she came over, a mischievous look in her eyes. "A warning would've been nice. I get back to the room at midnight to find you two curled up stark naked, clothes all over the floor, and with your naughty bits nearly uncovered by the blanket!"

Shinn turned beet red, Kira chuckled, "But you were expecting that, weren't you Harmony?"

"Mm... as much as I want to say yes, you two have a way of blowing my expectations out of the water," she responded lightly, smiling. "But anyways, let's get going to that concert! See what Lacus' competition is like."

The trio exited the hotel. The three of them managed to squeeze themselves on the motorcycle, Shinn wedged up at the front in Kira's lap; the older Coordinator's arms acting like bars on either side of him. The drive wasn't very long, and they managed to find parking and seats on a grassy knoll over-looking the stage.

Snuggling himself close to Kira's side, Shinn rested his head on his shoulder, completely relaxed. An arm came to rest gently around his shoulder, pulling him closer.

Loud music started playing. It was an upbeat temp; Shinn actually found himself liking the original song much more than this remix.

"Hello my brave Zaft soldiers!" Straining his neck to look up; Shinn spotted what look to be a custom pink Ginn. It seemed to have been specifically designed for this; and if he looked closely enough, he could see the Lacus look-a-like perched in its hands. "I hope you're all doing well today!"

Kira's hand tightened almost imperceptibly on his shoulder. Shinn shot a curious look at him; Kira's eyes were slightly hard. Lacus and he were close; Shinn remembered. It must be painful to see one of your closest friends masqueraded as in such a... degrading costume.

She hadn't changed the lyrics at all. But unlike Lacus, who Shinn remembered from a broadcast concert of her own, was much more demure and wouldn't dance across the stage like that. Not mention... was the impostor even wearing a bra? It was a miracle it seemed that she hadn't knocked herself out, what with them bouncing around like that.

Harmony nudged him, "Shinn-san." He looked at her curiously, spotting the binoculars in her hands; she gestured with them, "I think that Luna-san is looking for you Shinn-san." She offered him the binoculars, which he took, training them on the spot that she'd indicated.

Luna was easy to spot in her trademark mini skirt with her Zaft uniform. She seemed agitated, and kept turning to Athrun; asking him something to which he shook his head, looking worried himself. Shinn sighed; looked like his fellow soldiers were missing him. He'd better get back before they started up a search party for him. He didn't want to go, but he knew that he'd have too.

He leaned closer to Kira for a moment, pressing a gentle kiss against his jawline, "I have to go... the others are looking for me."

"Hmm? Oh, okay," Kira seemed a little distracted, but did give him a soft kiss on his temple before Shinn stood up to leave. "I'll call you later, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll see you Kira." Shinn hurried down the hill for the entrance to the base. He flashed his ID at the guards, who let him in with a curt nod. He raced past them and several other soldiers back to his quarters on the Minerva to change into his uniform.

Emerging from on board, he was just straightening the collar when Luna came pelting around the corner, "Shinn! There you are! I was looking for you everywhere!" She grabbed his hand and began pulling him roughly along behind her, "Come on! We have to hurry, the chairman's here and we've been called to meet him! If we don't hurry we won't make it in time!"

"Huh? Wha-what? Luna!"

Shinn stumbled as he tried to keep up with her maniac pace, his hand shot out steadying himself on a nearby wall. Luna didn't stop her reckless pace to say hello to her sister, instead, Shinn shouted a, "Good morning Meyrin!" at her while the older Hawke sister pulled him towards their destination.

Finally, she slowed to a walk outside a rather attractive building, headquarters at Diokia. Here, they met up with Athrun.

"Morning Shinn, I didn't see you last night," Athrun greeted. "And than Luna mentioned that she hadn't seen you around this morning. We were worried."

Shinn hurried to make up a plausible excuse, "Ah, well, I kind of ran into a friend of mine. We were catching up and lost track of the time..."

Athrun gave him a suspicious look, but said nothing else on the subject, "Nervous Shinn?"

"Maybe... just a little."

"Wow! I never knew you got nervous Shinn!" Luna sounded shocked.

" Of course I do! Why wouldn't I?!"

"You just seem so tough all the time, it's just a shock that you do." Shinn snorted, crossing his arms. He began to tune out Luna as she began to prattle on to Athrun about something or another; he really wasn't paying attention.

A tight coil seemed to have settled into his lower stomach. He'd noticed the dull ache that emanated from his behind that had been there since this morning, but this seemed different. Shinn remembered hearing about people who could 'sense' the future, and while he'd never put any stock in the subject, this feeling just felt like something he shouldn't ignore. After all, he'd only survived the attack on Orb by relying on his instincts; and he'd relied on those same instincts and feelings when he'd been with Kira, so he saw no reason to ignore them now.

This time however, they seemed... different. Dark almost, as if they were trying to warn him, telling him to run before something terrible happened to him. But he never got the chance to run, instead, he, Athrun, and Luna were escorted into headquarters and onto a balcony where lunch was waiting for them.

As well as the chairman.

Snapping to a salute, the chairman gave a small smile as he greeted each one of them, taking Athrun's hand, "Ah, Athrun, it's good to see you again; I hope that you've been well."

"Yes, thank you sir."

Than Shinn, "You must be Shinn Asuka; I've heard a lot about you lately. I'm glad that I assigned you as the pilot of the Impulse."

"I'm honored sir!" Durandul turned to Lunamaria.

"And you are?"

"Lunamaria Hawke sir!" Durandul smiled softly as he looked at all of them.

"I'm sorry about this rather last minute meeting, but I just felt that we needed to meet and talk. I hope that it is not an inconvenience to you Gladys kanchou," Talia shook her head; he gestured to the seats at the table. "Please, sit down. We have much to discuss."

The four pilots, Rey had arrived before them, took their seats at the long table. Durandul took his seat across from them, lacing his fingers together he gazed calmly at them from over his hands. Athrun broke the silence, "Are there any plans to bring this war to an end soon?"

Durandul sighed, his eyes drifted closed for a brief moment, "Unfortunately, the Earth Alliance will not compromise. It's often harder to take the path of peace than the path of war."

"But-" Shinn stopped himself; this was the chairman, he couldn't speak flippantly in front of him! Durandul looked towards him, a look of amusement perhaps on his face.

"Permission to speak freely Asuka-san." Shinn looked down, embarrassed.

"Thank you sir," he took a deep breath. "I think that finding alternatives to war is important. But it's important to fight when it's necessary to protect the ones you love," here he thought of Kira, Harmony, Luna, Meyrin; even Athrun. "And to protect civilians who are living peacefully."

Athrun chose here to interject, "However, someone once told me... if you kill someone for killing someone else, than the cycle will never stop, and there will never be peace. At the time, I couldn't come up with a reply; and I still haven't found one."

Durandul nodded, dropping his hands so that they rested on the table, "That's the problem. Why do people keep fighting? Why does this war continue? What do you think Shinn?"

Surprised that someone as important as the chairman was asking for his opinion, all Shinn could come up with was, "Uhh..." Oh yes Shinn, lovely. Very articulated, gathering his scattered thoughts, he tried to come up with a half-decent response that wouldn't end with him sounding like a total idiot, "I think... it's because of factions like Blue Cosmos and the Pacific Earth Alliance... or those who see fighting as a way to bring their ideals, however wrong and cruel they may be, to fruition."

"That's definitely a factor. However, there's a deeper cause that's much more difficult to deal with." Durandul stood, walking over to the edge of the balcony where a brand new mobile suit stood, "Take a look at that machine. Model ZGMF-X2000. That's the Gouf Ignited.

"During a war, countless numbers of these machines get destroyed, and new ones are created to replace them," Durandul stepped back a little, turning to face them, arms behind his back, "Think about the profit to be made on each one of these machines. If you think of the industry-"

"Chairman!" Talia seemed a little nervous about the whole subject, "We shouldn't be talking about this."

He turned away from them to look back at the mobile suit, "But it's the truth. For those who are in the business of making these machines, war is profitable. Their products are destroyed during combat; so they develop bigger, better machines to take their place. As long as there is profit, than those who profit will want to create the conditions of war."

Shinn could imagine the voices of soldiers as they fought; he himself had acted like that... and, Kira had too. Everyone had at one point been so consumed with fighting their 'enemy' that they'd, in some way, been fighting for those who wanted the war to continue.

"There are those who have encouraged those voices and controlled war as an industrial plan. That group is the Logos."

"Logos..." Shinn murmured quietly.

"Blue Cosmos is a faction of Logos," Durandul turned slightly so he could look back at them. "As long as they've got us playing their game, the war will never end. If possible, I would like to do something about this. However, it is probably the most difficult thing to do."

Silence fell on the small group. Shinn found himself mulling over all this new information, trying to fit it into the complex puzzle that this war and its politics were playing. He stared at his hands for several long moments. Several things seemed to fit, and he could agree with the chairman's vision for the future; a way to the end the war, in fact in that regard, he sounded a lot like Kira.

Lunch arrived shortly after, and conversation settled into lighter matters. Talia and the chairman were completely silent, and ate in silence as well even though they sat beside each other. Rey too, seemed quite; while Luna chatted idly at Shinn and Athrun. Shinn only joined in because of the uncomfortable feeling of eyes on him.

A quick glance out of the corners of his eyes showed that Durandul was watching him intently from across the table. Shinn pretended not to notice the scrutiny, and instead tried to focus on the conversation between Luna and Athrun.

It was a rather dull conversation, and Shinn lost interest rather quickly in it; and instead let his mind wander to other matters... his mind drifted to Kira and Harmony... he wondered what they were doing right now. He wondered when Kira would call him, probably later, and he'd be able to talk to him, see what he was doing, see how Harmony was and if she'd found anything on her sister.

Lunch finished, and the group stood all at once. Shinn was about to leave behind Rey and the others, when the chairman called him back, "Ah, Asuka-san, why don't you stay? I have a few things I would like to talk to you about."

"What? Oh! Of course sir!" Shinn snapped a hasty salute. Athrun cast a glance over his shoulder, but said nothing and left with Luna and Rey.

"If you will excuse me chairman, I have a few things to deal with on my ship before we leave in two days time," Talia disappeared after them, leaving Shinn alone with the chairman.

Nervous now, just as had been earlier, Shinn followed the chairman back inside headquarters. The two walked throughout the twisting hallways before stopping in front of a pair of double doors flanked by guards. Durandul nodded at them, and they opened the doors. They entered.

Durandul gestured at a couch overlooking the harbor, "Please, make yourself comfortable." Nodding, Shinn missed the rather suggestive look the chairman was giving him, he was just grateful to sit down; his behind still hurt from the night before, but it was something he was willing to live with if it meant he could be with Kira.

He was jerked out of his thoughts by a hand running rather... forcefully along his thigh in what he supposed was a lover's gesture but it just didn't feel right. It was too forceful, too rough; so much unlike Kira. He recoiled from the touch; especially when he realized just who it was coming from.

"Ch-chairman!" Shinn scooted farther away; only to have Durandul mirror his movements, the older Coordinator positioning himself over Shinn effectively pinning him to the couch. Shinn moved backwards as quickly as he could, until his head met the armrest and his movement was corralled.

Instinctively, his hands came up in fists, beating at the chairman as he turned his head away. His legs thrashed wildly as he tried to escape.

"Feisty little thing aren't you?" Durandul purred, tilting his head so he could kiss him. Shinn managed to bounce his forehead off Durandul's nose. Recoiling, an angry look passed across the chairman's face; he slapped Shinn, hard. Shinn's head spun from the impact, and his cheek throbbed. Somehow, he knew it would leave a bruise.

Than, as if it had never happened, Durandul stroked Shinn's injured cheek, "If you do what I say, than no one has to get hurt."

Shinn whimpered but said nothing. His eyes dulled suddenly, and his body went limp, accepting defeat. He knew that even if he did manage to injure the chairman enough to escape, he'd be arrested and put to death; leaving Kira with no way of knowing what had happened to him.

_Kira..._

The mere thought of the older Coordinator gave Shinn some consolation. He kept his head turned away, and retreated into himself. Burying his face into a pillow, he bit down on it and focused on not crying out or making any noise.

A blaring noise issued from Mayu's cell which Shinn had stowed in the inside pocket of his jacket. Durandul frowned in confusion, pulling it out, he glanced at the idea for a moment before a look of pure anger twisted his features. He roughly placed it on the nearby coffee table before returning to what he had been doing before.

Shinn's eyes widened in his self-imposed, cloth blindfold; the only person it could be... Kira! He bit down harder on the pillow and swore that whatever happened, Kira wouldn't know.  


* * *

  
"Kira-san? What's wrong?" Harmony asked as she came up beside him. "You've got this look on your face..."

"Shinn's not answering his cell." Frowning, Harmony crossed her arms, about to chastise him. Kira cut her off, "Yes Harmony, I've realized that he could be in the middle of something, but I've been trying to get a hold of him for five hours now, and still nothing."

"I'm sure... he has an explanation for it..." Harmony murmured quietly; she could tell that Kira's thoughts had taken a much darker turn. "And I'm sure it has nothing to do with you Kira-san! Shinn-san loves you very much, I can tell. He's probably just busy! Or maybe he hasn't gotten your messages yet, give him a little more time before you jump to any conclusions. I'll try calling him later, okay?"

Kira nodded, trying to accept what Harmony said as the truth, but this nagging suspicion inside of him refused to let him believe it in its entiriety. Something just didn't sit right with him.

He just didn't know yet how dead-on that was.  


* * *

  
Whew! I'm terribly sorry that it took me so long to get this finished. And umm... yeah I know there are no details, but I just couldn't find the stomach to write it; I was sick just thinking about it. Honestly, this is not something that anyone deserves to experience, and I just couldn't bring myself to convey it to you all. That and I don't think that anyone who is actually reading this story supports Gil/Shinn.

So, please leave me some reviews (I've noticed the lack of them). They make my day and make me want to update faster. I've actually planned everything out for this story completely, and we are almost at the one third mark. Yes, that's right, we're almost a third of the way done this story. I hope you all stay around till I've finished it.

Kat. 


	6. Phase 6: Hatred of Vengeance

**A/N:** Sorry for the long wait for the next chapter, year end stuff is happening and I've had grad stuff to do as well as preparing for my finals so I haven't really had much time to myself to work on my fanfiction. It's been very neglected as of late, except for a few editions of stuff that I wrote when I should've been reviewing (which I nearly got into a lot of trouble for) and some uploading of some stuff that I should have uploaded a while ago. I really hate how I've been neglecting my fanfiction... once summer starts up, I'll be free to work on them non-stop for the most part. I write more during the summer months anyways.  
Also, I apologize that this chapter isn't as long as the others; I couldn't really think of all that much to put into it, but I tried my best.**  
WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS MENTIONS OF THINGS OF A SEXUAL AND NON-CONSENSUAL NATURE. IF ANYTHING OF THIS SORT OFFENDS YOU, I SUGGEST YOU TURN BACK NOW. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.  
Disclaimer: **Gundam SEED Destiny is the property of Bandai, Hajime Yatate, and Yoshiyuki Tomino. I own Harmony and the plot; that's it.**  
Dedication: **This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

**Phase 6: Hatred of Vengeance**

If you were to look into Shinn Asuka's eyes at this moment in time, you'd think he was dead.

The normally bright and vibrant red irises were dull and empty; soulless. His clothes were askew and looked like he'd put them on in the dark as he stumbled away from his shared room with Rey. Right now, the last thing that he wanted was to be around people; being around them, especially people who were still 'pure', made him feel even more dirty and horrible. He needed to get away.

The closest place that Shinn could get to were the cliffs overlooking the sea. Taking a motorcycle from the base, he'd ditched his uniform for civilian clothes and took off as quickly as he could; speeding along the treacherous roads in an effort to leave his feelings behind him. It didn't work.

He didn't care that he wasn't wearing a helmet; didn't care that if he crashed he'd most likely die, nothing really mattered to him anymore. All he knew, and cared about, was that Kira would be sad if he did perish and that he would never know why or the details of it. But that made him feel horribly guilty inside; that he would be continuing to let Kira love someone and mourn for someone who didn't deserve it.

After all, for letting Durandul... for letting him violate himself like that, was unforgivable. He didn't deserve Kira's love. Maybe he never had.

His hands shook as he tightened them on the handle bars, tears threatening to blur his sight. Pulling off onto a shoulder of the highway, Shinn let the motorcycle land on its side before dropping to his knees on the hard stone and letting his emotions take him.

Shinn didn't know how long he stayed there weeping; but it didn't make him feel any better, for no amount of tears could undue what had happened. Eventually he curled himself into a ball and just stayed like that, the tears leaving trails of salt water on his face. Whenever he closed his eyes, images replayed back to him; draining him further.

Soon, his eyes could no longer stay open; his body was too drained and exhausted to stay awake. He collapsed into a dreamless slumber right there on the shoulder of the highway.

* * *

"Wake up mister! Wake up!" Shinn's eyes twitched at the poking his was receiving and the near childish voice that was calling to him. When one of those hands grabbed his shoulder, his eyes shot wide open and he sat up suddenly, scaring the person, and flew backwards from them; eyes wide and fearful. The contact had brought back horrible memories.

It took several long minutes for Shinn to regain some control over himself. The young girl, because she couldn't be much older then he was, stared back at him with hauntingly familiar magenta eyes. Her blond hair was short, cut to about chin length, and she wore a pretty blue sun dress; over all, she looked too innocent for her age, but was none the less rather pretty.

"Stellar apologizes, she didn't think that she would scare you so," she apologized. Shinn wondered vaguely why she chose to talk in third person, but dismissed it; she was an odd girl. "But Stellar was worried that you might have been in trouble and she only wanted to help..."

"Shinn."

"Huh?"

"Shinn, that's my name." Shinn hadn't realized how rough his voice was. It was quiet and lifeless; devoid of any emotion, just like his eyes.

"Oh... Stellar is happy that Shinn is alive," Stellar nodded to herself. "She was worried that Shinn might have had an accident and was injured, so she is glad that you're okay." The childlike innocence of Stellar was shocking to Shinn; he'd never thought that he'd see that sort of emotion in someone again, especially someone his own age.

He numbly felt Mayu's phone vibrating in his pocket, pulling it out, he flipped it open.

_16 missed calls._

Staring at the display for several long moments, Shinn wondered what he should do. The best choice would be to tell Kira straight out what had happened; but everything in his being screamed out at him not too, this was his shame to bear and not anyone else's. Besides, Kira would never want someone like him; not a damaged, broken person who couldn't even stop someone else from violating them against their will. No, Kira deserved someone better, someone who was pure and whole; like Lacus.

He felt something in his heart shatter, and the tears threatened to start anew.

Shinn hadn't realized that his hands had been shaking until he felt small, delicate hands covering them. Stellar was peering at him in confusion; looking very much like a lost child. But also... something about her was hauntingly familiar, Shinn just couldn't place where that familiarity was originating from.

"Is Shinn okay? He's shaking..." she frowned at him. "Did someone call Shinn?" Before he could say anything, the phone was slipped from his grasp and Stellar had deftly hit the redial button; calling whoever had called him last. Shinn stared open-mouthed, terrified. There was silence for a few moments.

"_Shinn?! Shinn are you okay?!"_

"Shinn is... shaking," Stellar began. "Stellar doesn't know what is wrong with him."

"_Who is this?!"_

"Stellar." Shinn reached out for the phone desperately, trying to take it back from Stellar; she backed up a little, staying out of his reach. "She found Shinn on the road, unconscious and stopped to see if he was okay; but when he woke up and looked at his phone, he seemed sad and started to shake. Stellar wondered if maybe the person who called him knew what was wrong with him."

"_Stellar-san, where are you? I'll be there as soon as possible."_

"One of the cliff sides near Diokia, there is a really nice view of the ocean. Stellar wonders why it's so blue."

The sound of an engine accelerating could be heard in the background over the phone, _"Stellar, please put Shinn on the line."_

She wordlessly handed Shinn the phone. Shinn thought about slamming it closed, but then thought better of it, "... K-Kira..."

"_Shinn! Where have you been?! What happened?! I've been so worried. You haven't returned any of my calls, and Harmony tried to call you four times to which you never responded."_

"I-I... I'm so sorry... Kira..." he couldn't help it; the sorrow slipped into his voice and he could feel that the flood gates were about to open once more. He wanted to get away; to hurl himself off the cliff and plunge to his death in the sea below, but something held him there.

"_Why are you apologizing Shinn? You haven't done anything..."_

Shinn shook his head wildly; he couldn't think straight right now, all he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and cry. He wanted to be alone; but he also, and he was ashamed for this, wanted Kira to hold him in his arms again while he cried. But he couldn't do that, it would be selfish of him and cruel. There was no way that he would force himself on Kira like that, no, he couldn't; Kira was too important to him to do that, if Kira didn't want him, then he might as well throw himself into the ocean.

Kira was all he had.

"I... I... Kira I'm so sorry..." Shinn rambled apologizing continually. Stellar was watching him with concerned eyes; she eventually was beside him and wrapped her arms, somewhat awkwardly like she wasn't quite sure how to provide comfort, around his shoulders and squeezed them gently.

"_Please, stop apologizing Shinn. Nothing that you've done could ever mean you have to apologize to me; I'm almost there. Please, **please** don't do anything stupid or reckless until I'm there, alright?"_

In the wake of Kira's pleas, Shinn could do nothing but give in, "... yes, alright."

"_I love you Shinn."_ He hung up. Shinn's shaking fingers closed the phone and he sagged into Stellar; breaking down.

_For now, but for how much longer will you feel that way?_

* * *

"Luna, you haven't seen Shinn this morning, have you?" Rey asked calmly. Luna shook her head.

"No, I haven't seen him since yesterday at the meeting with the chairman. Did he come back to his room yesterday?" she responded as the two proceeded towards the cafeteria for breakfast.

Rey shook his head, "I haven't seen him since yesterday as well. I'm a little concerned about him; it's not like him to stay away for so long."

"Maybe he went back out into the city? You know, to get some air?" Luna offered as an explanation.

"Perhaps, but even so, it's not like Shinn to stay out at night. He's always here, except..."

Luna gasped, "That's right! He was missing the night before too!" Rey took this all into account; Gil had thought the _Archangel_ was nearby, and that Shinn might have had some contact with crew members from it while in Orb...

Gil had been planning to _**convince**_ Shinn to betray any information that he might know to them; for the betterment of the world.

Did Gil have something to do with Shinn's mysterious disappearance?

Rey didn't know.

But he wanted to find out; to know for certain what was wrong with Shinn.

After all, Shinn was the only one who he completely trusted on board Minerva; the only one who had shown him friendship despite of his actions.

Yes, Shinn was his friend.

* * *

"Shinn!"

Kira's skidded the motorcycle to a stop, leaping off of it before it had even come to a complete stop letting it skid along the rough stone. He landed expertly on both feet and raced over in three long strides; dropping to his knees in front of him. Shinn trembled and bit his lip, unsure of everything now. Eventually his tears won out and he threw himself at Kira, clinging to his shirt and burying his face into the corner of his neck. For a moment, Kira was surprised, then he wrapped his arms around Shinn, holding him to himself gently yet firmly.

Stellar watched with wide, confused, child-like eyes, she raised a finger to rest on her cheek thinking. It took a few moments, but her face lit up with realization, "Oh! You must be Shinn's special person." Her face turned into a bright smile. "I'm Stellar!"

Kira returned the smile half-heartedly, most of his attention was focused on the crying teenager in his arms, "Thank you... for finding him Stellar-san. I'm Kira and... yes, I suppose that I am."

She clapped her hands together happily, "Ah, then Stellar is happy."

"K-Kira..." Shinn shuddered, hard. "I-I... I'm so-"

"No, no more apologizing Shinn," Kira reprimanded softly, placing his fingers on the younger Coordinator's lips. "Please, try to calm down a little and tell me, please tell me, what's happened? What's wrong?"

"N-no... I-I..." Shinn shook his head wildly. "The-the chairman... he... he..." Hands tenderly rubbed soothing circles on his back, in an effort to offer comfort and calm him. Several long minutes passed, but Shinn just seemed closer to a panic attack then before; Kira was starting to worry and suspect the worst.

"Shinn..."

"Is there anything Stellar can do?" Stellar inched closer and tugged lightly on Shinn's sleeve; revealing dark bruises along his wrist and arms. "Shinn! You're injured!" His hands were suddenly pushing Shinn's sleeves up and examining the dark bruises carefully, his lavender eyes running over them; recognizing the tell-tale signs that hands had caused them.

"You... Shinn, take your jacket off."

There was no room for argument in his tone. Shinn trembled terribly as he did so, pulling the high collared and long sleeved jacket off, letting it fall to the stone. He refused to meet Kira's shocked eyes, instead staring forlornly at the ground. This was it, his secret was out now. He squeezed his eyes closed and waited for the yelling to come; the rejection.

It didn't.

Instead, Stellar's delicate hands examined his arm that Kira had been looking at earlier; lightly touching the dark bruises, a look of worried wonder in her eyes. There was a loud ripping noise that jerked Shinn's eyes open. "S-Stellar!"

She'd torn the skirt of her dress into thin strips and was currently tying the ripped strips around the dark bruises on his wrists, he hadn't noticed the finger nail imprints and scabs that they'd left behind. Her eyes were harder now, sad almost. "Stellar doesn't want to see anyone hurt, to see more people... die..." At that word, her entire body started to tremble. "No... dying is bad... Stellar doesn't want to die."

Wordlessly, Shinn placed his hand over her quivering hand, he couldn't smile; so he just tried his best to look comforting. Kira still hadn't said anything, his hand had instead raised wordlessly, brushing across the bruise on his cheek; when Shinn finally gathered the courage to look into his eyes, the expression there was unreadable. It looked... Shinn couldn't say, couldn't place it. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back more tears that threatened to spill over once again.

It was the sensation of lips brushing against the bruise on his cheek that his eyes shot wide open. Kira was watching him again, now though, the emotions were identifiable. Anger. Sorrow. Love.

Shinn gasped, Kira... Kira couldn't still... Kira still loved him?

"Kira..."

"Shinn, you idiot," he pulled Shinn close, into a tight embrace. Stellar pulled back, kneeling beside them; feeling a little awkward at being witness to such a intimate scene. "Why...? Why didn't you return my calls and tell me?"

"You... I..." Shinn started crying, leaning into Kira. "I... I thought... you wouldn't love me... if you knew..."

Kira kissed Shinn's temple, "Nothing, and I mean nothing, could ever stop me from loving you. You're far, far too precious to me for me to be able to do that; I refuse to hurt you anymore Shinn." His arms were firm around Shinn, a safe harbor. Yes, that was true; Kira's was safe, he'd protect him. "I'm sorry Shinn... I promised to protect you, I'm sorry that I couldn't."

"N-no... it's not... not your fault."

"Stellar thinks it's no one's fault but the person who did it and they should take responsibility for what they've done," Stellar nodded firmly in her child-like way; it was odd and slightly unnerving that someone her age could still possess such childish innocence, but at the same time it offered hope for the future. Kira could see parts of who he'd been before becoming mixed up in the war with this girl. He'd already placed the magenta eyes and familiar set of the face.

But still, his first concern was Shinn, "I am not letting you go back there Shinn."

"K-Kira...!" Shinn knew that he had too, that he should; but he also knew that there would be no getting around Kira, especially when he was determined. "I h-have too... you'd be in so much danger if you took me..."

"No buts Shinn," Kira's voice was hard; he was definitely angry. "I am not allowing you to go back there, where I can't protect you and where there's no way that that _**bastard**_ can hurt you like this again." It was definite; Kira was angry.

Downright livid to be exact.

And it was scary.

Shinn shook as he clung to the older Coordinator, he didn't want to go back, truly he didn't. Staying with Kira would probably be safest for him, a place where he could try and recover some form of normalcy; in fact, it probably would be the only place that he could. Shinn closed his eyes, relaxing against Kira, and nodded.

Picking the trembling and near breaking point Shinn up bridal style, he was a little surprised that Stellar had already figured out what he was going to do and had righted his motorcycle for him; gently, he placed Shinn on the seat, kissing his forehead lightly before removing his hands from his shirt so that he could speak with Stellar. But first, he took several deep breaths; he needed to control his anger.

Durandul was a dead man walking. For violating and leaving his Shinn in such a state... Kira would be sure to see that his days were numbered. And that he, Kira, would be the one to pull the trigger.

Once he'd gained control of his anger, he turned to Stellar, "What about you Stellar-san? Would you like to come with us as well? Harmony would be happy to see you alive and well."

Shinn started. That's where he'd seen the familiarity! This was Stellar! Harmony's sister! How could he have missed that?

"Harmony? Kira-san knows onee-chan?" Stellar's magenta eyes opened wide. Kira nodded.

"She's been looking for you for years now, Stellar, you still have a home to come back too," Kira held out his hand to her. Stellar looked at it warily.

"Stellar... Stellar doesn't think she can... Stellar would let down Neo and Auel and Sting," Stellar was muttering, arms wrapped carefully around herself. "But Stellar wants to see onee-chan..." Stellar stood there for several long moments before deciding. "Where is onee-chan? Stellar will go see her, but Stellar won't be able to stay; Stellar has people that she needs to return too."

Pulling his hand back, Kira smiled, "Harmony is in Diokia at present, if you head there and to the Gentle Arms cafe, you'll find her there at noon." Stellar beamed at him.

"Stellar thanks Kira-san! She'll go meet her onee-chan right now so that onee-chan knows that Stellar is safe and happy!" she turned and started skipping down the road towards town; it wasn't far, she'd be there before noon. Kira had a feeling she'd be safe, he turned back to his trembling love.

Straddling the motorcycle behind Shinn, Kira pulled the helmet onto him before pulling one on himself. He wrapped his arms around Shinn for a long moment, "I love you Shinn, remember that, because it won't change. No one will hurt you, not anymore."

Shinn's eyes watered, but he didn't say anything as Kira revved up the engine and took off, speeding away from Diokia and the base and Zaft.

But most of all, away from the chairman.

As the miles passed, Shinn grew more and more relaxed; eventually collapsing into oblivion as they drove along the winding sea roads.

* * *

Urg, I should stop writing at obscenely early hours, but it's really the only time now that I have to work on my own fanfiction. I'm getting sick of school, but I have university to attend come next year; however, the summer is mine and I just have diplomas and then blissful nothingness! Ah, I'm so happy!

Any who, this has deviated a lot from what I originally planned, so I'm going to have to revise and rewrite all my plans to compensate for this. Kinda strange actually. There's a fourteen phase difference from this version to the original for when Kira brings Shinn to the _Archangel_; but I like this version more. Be glad, Shinn fans, I'm being nicer to Shinn in this version.

Please read and review!

Kat.


	7. Phase 7: Shinn

**A/N:** I started this phase almost immediately after I posted the sixth phase, and now I have to replan everything for this story because of the changes I've made. If anyone's wondering, this time round I'm only going to plan a few phases ahead because, apparently, that's the only way that my plot bunnies will cooperate with; and without them, there would be no story.  
Anyways, I was hoping for more reviews then what I got; you guys do know that those little reviews help me to stave off the writer's block and help me keep going, right? I don't stay up this late because I like too, but I do like to know that my work is appreciated.  
As well, I've noticed that it's incredibly hard to identify what color Shinn's hair is. In some scenes of him, it looks like a very dark violet, others it looks black, and even sometimes an incredibly dark shade of brown. I really can't tell; so from now on I'm just going to call it black, if I called it something else in previous phases, I apologize to any readers who I may have confused by that. My apologies.  
**WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS MENTIONS OF THINGS OF A SEXUAL AND NON-CONSENSUAL NATURE. IF ANYTHING OF THIS SORT OFFENDS YOU, I SUGGEST YOU TURN BACK NOW. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.  
Disclaimer:** Gundam SEED Destiny is the property of Bandai, Hajime Yatate, and Yoshiyuki Tomino; and not me. I only own Harmony and the plot; that's it.**  
Dedication:** This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

**Phase 7: Shinn**

Kira watched as his love slept as he made his way along the winding roads towards where the _Archangel_ was hidden. He knew that he'd have to calm down before he encountered anyone on board; but he didn't see it as being possible, Kira had always thought before that he could control his anger well, but he'd never been faced with a situation like this one before.

Hell, he'd never been in love like__this before either.

Now he knew what the chairman had done, Kira could never forgive him; he'd kill him the moment that he had the chance to do so. The attempted assassination of Lacus had been the first straw, but this just bypassed all of the others to make itself the last straw for him. Durandul wouldn't be forgiven; he would pay for what he'd done to **_Kira's_** beloved and very fragile Shinn. This had been the first time since the last war that Kira had felt such potent rage welling up in himself; no, this was stronger then that. This was murderous rage that he felt now, there was no way that he could reign it in; there would be no forgiveness for Durandul.

None.

Swinging off onto an almost unseen narrow dirt road, Kira continued stewing his rage; letting it wash over him as his hands tightened almost minutely on the handles, almost unnoticeable. Winding the final turn and emerging onto the cliffside, Kira steered towards where the entrance to the ship was. He was surprised to see Cagalli standing on the edge of the cliff; staring out over the sea. She turned when she heard the roar of the motorcycle.

Cagalli immediately noticed the tense and rigid set of her brother's shoulders; the way his anger seemed to seethe off him to the point where his normally soft amethyst eyes looked dark and empty. Something had flipped a switch in her brother, and it didn't seem to be for the good. Slowly, she approached him as he cut the engine and carefully picked up a body that was perched precariously on the front of the bike's seat. The person flopped a little before eyes cracked open.

Gasping when she recognized them, she couldn't help but exclaim, "Shinn!"

Shinn's shot wide and he suddenly clung to Kira's shirt, almost looking like he was frantically trying to get behind him; Cagalli recognized that it was pure fear that drove him. Kira's eyes softened and his body language relaxed, he wrapped his arms around Shinn; one under his knees and the other curled around his back so that he could easily carry him. His hand rubbed soothing circles along the younger Coordinator's back, whispering something to him that seemed to calm him down slightly. He peeked at her nervously; his crimson eyes still reflecting fear.

"K-Kira...?" her voice shook; she noticed the visible shudder that rocked Shinn's frame. "What's going on?"

"... Cagalli." Shinn buried his face in Kira's neck, whimpering. "I'm sorry... please don't do anything too sudden."

"Kira, I - what - how?" she nodded dumbly. What the hell was going on here? It didn't make any sense to her. Why was Shinn here, with her brother no less, and what had put him into such a state? She lowered her voice, concerned now. "Is there anything I can do?"

Kira walked towards her and the ship, a trembling Shinn in his arms, "Could you get a first aid kit and some food and bring it to my quarters? I don't want to leave Shinn alone like this."

"Right!" Cagalli dashed into the _Archangel_; her mind a whirlwind of thoughts and scenarios, none that really made any sense. But still... she'd have to worm the truth out of Kira soon; once Shinn was safely asleep, she was pretty positive that he wouldn't want anyone to know of whatever it was that happened to him, he had a very prideful nature. Even so, Cagalli was fiercely determined to find out; if there was something that she could do to help him, she'd do it, this was a way for her to make amends for the wrong Shinn perceived against her and her family.

The violet-eyed Coordinator watched as his sister raced into the Archangel before he followed at a slower pace. Realizing a little too late that Shinn's trembling and fears were from being around strangers, he knew that he'd have to reach his quarters faster so as to avoid the most people. He just wanted to get Shinn somewhere safe, and fast, somewhere where he could look after Shinn without prying eyes on them; he hated to see the young man that he'd fallen in love with so terrified and broken.

Luck seemed to be with him, for he reached his destination without encountering anyone. Opening the door, he stepped in and placed Shinn gently on the bed. He peered up at Kira with dull red eyes, "... Kira..."

"Shinn, don't worry," Kira knelt in front of him, his hands cupping Shinn's cheeks. "You don't have to be scared, you're safe here. You're safe now."

"I-I... I'm safe?"

"Yes, he won't hurt you anymore; I'll make sure of that. I'll protect you," Kira's voice was harder then usual, but the promise was still there and it held Shinn to what little grasp on himself that he still had.

"Where... where am I?"

"You're onboard the _Archangel_, in my room." Shinn looked at him, his eyes watching Kira's almost warily. "Shinn... I love you, I won't allow anyone to hurt you again; especially not that bastard."

Tears were welling up again in his eyes, "K-Kira..." Kira nearly sighed; he had his work cut out for him in convincing Shinn that he had nothing to be ashamed of, that Kira still loved him.

"Shinn, tell me what's troubling you," Kira's thumbs stroked away the tears, giving Shinn a soft smile. "Let me in again, let me help you."

He started crying harder, shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs, "... you... you're already in... but... how can I... how can I be what you want now...? I'm nothing... worthless, tainted..."

"No Shinn," Kira's voice was hard. "You are exactly what I want, what I love is you. You're not worthless or tainted; none of what has happened is your fault, and I don't blame you. No one will blame you, if they do... I will make sure they take it back. You are worth so much more then what you seem to think you are. Shinn, your worth is more then the purity of your body; I would still love you no matter what." He leaned up, not sure if Shinn would be comfortable with a kiss to the lips; so he pressed a kiss to the boy's cheek instead.

There was a soft knock at the door, Shinn stiffened and looked to Kira in fear. Kira smiled at him, "It's fine, don't worry Shinn. It's just Cagalli, my sister. Listen Shinn, if anything happens or you need anything and I'm not around, you can go to her, okay? She'll help you and look after you; she's safe."

"O-okay..." Shinn remembered now; Kira had mentioned that Cagalli was his sister before, she was related to Kira, so did that mean she was safe? Kira thought so, and Shinn trusted Kira, so she would be. He'd trust her, or at least try to.

The door opened with a whoosh and the worried blond entered; a simple meal and a first aid kit balanced on a tray that she held in her hands. Slowly, she approached, placing the tray on the desk at the door; she was also dressed in civilian clothes, like Kira, but the look on her face was different. It was alive with concern and confusion; but there was a fierce determination there as well.

Standing up, Kira walked over to the desk, retrieving the first aid kit first, "Let me see your injuries Shinn, then you can eat and rest, alright?" Shinn nodded.

Removing the makeshift bandages from his wrists, Kira first dabbed on a little antiseptic to the scratches there before binding them. His hands gently rubbed over Shinn's arms, searching for any further injuries; when he found none, he gently pulled on Shinn's light t-shirt.

"N-no... Kira you don't-"

"Shinn, don't be ashamed. I need to make sure that you're not injured anywhere major." The younger Coordinator looked away, before allowing the amethyst eyed one to pull his shirt up and over his head. No injuries leapt out at Kira, but several dark bruises covered the pale skin; they looked like they'd been caused in a struggle. "Did you fight him Shinn?"

"I-I couldn't just... but he..." Shinn looked like he was on the verge of breaking down again; Kira wordlessly sat beside him on the bed and pulled him into his arms. He ran soothing fingers through the black hair, trying his best to calm down the battered and very much broken Coordinator who just so happened to hold his heart.

"Shush, it's fine now Shinn. I'm so proud that you fought back, it's alright, you don't have to be ashamed for attempting to fight him off," Kira's voice was soft. Cagalli took a seat on a stool she'd pulled over, watching the entire scene silently with an unreadable look on her face; her eyes hard. "You don't know, how proud of you I am. You gave it your all, Shinn, it's fine. He'll pay for what he did to you, you can rest now. You're safe and loved; I won't let anything hurt you."

It seemed like hours until Shinn had finally cried himself out and collapsed against Kira, having cried himself to sleep. Tear tracks were left on the pale cheeks, one of which was still covered with an ugly purple bruise, gently, Kira wiped them away before lying the exhausted teen down on his bed and tucking him in under the clean covers. He'd hunt up something clean for him to wear later.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Kira watched as Shinn slept; he looked so peaceful when he slept, so innocent, you wouldn't believe that he'd gone through what he had. Kira watched; knowing that nightmares would come, and that he would stay right here for whenever Shinn would need him. There was no way that he was leaving his young love's side now.

"Are you going to explain this to me now?" Cagalli asked, her tone clipped and short. Kira turned back to face his sister.

"Sorry Cagalli," Kira responded. Cagalli was startled by the rage underlying his tone; she'd never heard that emotion coming from Kira. Not even when he spoke about the attempted assassination of Lacus; what was his this Coordinator boy to Kira? "I'll explain it as best I can."

She took a deep breath, "You brought a Zaft soldier back here. And not just any soldier, but an elite red coat who is serving on board the _Minerva_; which, from what I've made out, is a ship that the chairman highly favors. So why?"

"Because I couldn't leave him there, I wouldn't." Kira's voice was tense with his rage and thirst for vengeance; his hands clenched tightly into fists. "Not in the state he's in, I won't leave him anywhere where that _**bastard**_ can get his hands on him."

Cagalli crossed her arms, that was a bit of an evasion; but then, she guessed her question had rather broad meanings, so she tried again, "What is he to you? This is more then worrying over a friend; so what is he to you?"

"Everything, Cagalli. I love him."

A loud gasp slipped past her lips. She couldn't doubt him, the look in his eyes, the way he spoke, the way he'd held Shinn and spoke to him; it all showed just how deeply the older Coordinator's feelings for the garnet eyed Coordinator ran. This was more then just a passing fancy or interest, this was real love at its strongest. Pulling them apart would cause irrevocable damage to either of them; it was as if their very spirits had been melded together on the deepest level.

But still! "What about Lacus?! You can't just-"

"Lacus and I realized a long time ago that... we weren't meant to be," Kira spoke, his tone softer then it had been when he'd spoken about why he'd taken Shinn. "She doesn't know about Shinn and I, but we never had a relationship like what you think it was to begin with. All we've ever been is close friends, I was planning on telling her about this; but now... I'm going to have to."

"What?! But I - I mean..." Cagalli wasn't even sure what she was trying to say at this point, so she stopped that train of thought. "Even still, you're going to have to tell everyone about the fact that you've brought a Zaft soldier on board; and that Zaft soldier just happens to be the pilot of the _Impulse_, you do realize that we're going to have to leave now. Before they stage a huge search for him; you'll have to call Harmony back from her search for her sister."

"Yes, I know that I'll have to tell everyone." Kira looked back to Shinn. "And I met Harmony's sister, Stellar-san, she went into town after I met her to see Harmony. She's really a sweet and innocent girl, I just hope the war doesn't corrupt her or hurt her; it's people like her... that remind about what I'm fighting for."

"Oh..." Now for the biggest question. "What happened to Shinn? That made him this way? I'm guessing that this has something to do with why you brought Shinn here."

Kira's hands tightened into fists once more, tighter then before. He ground his teeth together, rage and malice pouring off him in almost visual waves; his voice was tight, rigid with anger when he spoke, "That bastard of a chairman caused this." He paused trying to gather himself a little but ultimately failed. "As far as I can tell, he sexually abused Shinn."

"You mean he raped him?!" Cagalli was in shock, then the anger set in. "That bastard! Kira, if you're going to kill him, then I will be more then willing to help you tear him limb from limb and make his death excruciatingly painful." While Cagalli might not feel the same way Kira did about Shinn, nothing even close to it, she realized that he meant a lot to her brother; she'd do whatever she could. And the thought of someone, anyone, doing something like that to someone else... well, it set her blood boiling! Especially when they were in a position of power over the other!

Durandul was now facing the combined wrath of the Yamato-Athha siblings.

"Thank you Cagalli. For now though... all we can do is help him recover." Kira's hands were shaking as he tried forcefully to relax himself and focus on his lover. Yes, right now his first priority was Shinn and his recovery; nothing else mattered right now, really, except that. "Help him regain as much of himself as he can, though I doubt he'll ever fully be the same again."

"I've seen what happens to people who go through that sort of thing... and I've seen that not everyone makes it through such an experience. Kira... do you think he will?"

"Shinn's strong... I can only hope that he will. I don't know what I would do if I were to lose him."

And Cagalli believed him, and prayed with all of her heart and being that Shinn would make it through; that he'd pull through this. If not for his sake, but for Kira's as well.

She was realizing that Shinn was Kira's everything and that nothing would change that; if Shinn couldn't pull through, this would turn from merely being a sad and horrifying event to becoming a tragic tale of two lovers. Cagalli didn't want that.

So she prayed that it wouldn't become that.

* * *

Harmony sighed as she headed back towards the Gentle Arms café that she'd stopped at the day before yesterday and spent the day with those two siblings from Zaft as well as Shinn, and later Kira. It hadn't been a good day for information gathering; the lab had been abandoned for a while now, so any leads that it could've offered had long dried up. All evidence of what it had housed and the experiments that had been performed that had been removed, and none of the high-tech equipment had been left behind except for a few destroyed computers and ransacked supply closets. She ran a hand through her black hair and sighed angrily, a cup of tea would do her good right now.

As she crossed the street towards the café, a flash of blond hair caught her eye. She hadn't seen very many blonds here, and that one... it looked familiar. Could it be...?

"Stellar?!"

"Onee-chan?!"

"Oh my god! Stellar!" Harmony raced the remaining distance to her little sister; throwing her arms around the smaller girl in a desperate embrace. She'd been right! She had been right to not give up hope! Stellar was alive! Her little sister was alive and well and here with her! Harmony could dance and sing! She certainly felt like it. "Are you alright?! I've been so worried about you! And Stellar - oh! I've missed you so much, you can't imagine!"

And right there she collapsed into tears against her sister's shoulder. Stellar smiled childishly, wrapping her arms around her weeping older sister and holding her, "But Stellar is here right now and is very much safe and happy, so onee-chan doesn't have to worry about her anymore."

Laughing shortly, Harmony pulled back, wiping at her tears for a moment before poking Stellar on the forehead; right between the eyes. "Silly Stellar! That's what an onee-chan is supposed to do! Worry after their little sister."

"But Stellar doesn't want onee-chan to worry about her; she wants onee-chan to be happy," Stellar replied as the two held hands and entered the small, quaint café. "Stellar's happy to see onee-chan again."

The two newly reunited sisters sat down at a small table, Harmony ordered some iced green tea with pomegrante juice, while Stellar asked for apple juice. Harmony watched her sister carefully; noticing how she'd grown from the shy little girl that she'd been into a beautiful young woman who still held the innocence that she herself had lost years ago. She smiled sadly at the thought; well, Stellar was alive and obviously still the innocent, naïve little girl. That warmed Harmony's heart.

"I've been so worried about you Stellar. I thought you were... that you were dead."

Stellar cocked her to the side cutely, "Why would onee-chan think that? Stellar has been alive this entire time and wants to stay alive too, she's glad that onee-chan is alive too, and healthy. But is onee-chan happy?"

"Yes, I'm happy now that I know you're alive and safe. But what are you doing here in Diokia?"

"Oh, Auel and Sting brought Stellar here with them, Sting looks after Stellar very well; but Auel annoys Stellar and makes fun of her and picks on her. But otherwise, Stellar is happy with her 'family'. But she wants to know what onee-chan has been doing."

A sad smile crossed Harmony's features as their drinks arrived, "I've been looking for you... ever since I was old enough; that's what I've been doing. But... after the attack on Orb two years ago, I've been working alongside a few friends that I made during the war. We're only in Diokia for a few days, we have to move on soon."

"Oh... so onee-chan won't be here for very long either."

"You're not here permanently Stellar?" Harmony was curious; but she was dreading what had actually happened to her little sister, she had a horrible sinking feeling in her stomach that this would be the last time that she'd be able to talk to Stellar like this. But she shoved it away, refusing to believe it.

"No, Neo says that we have to keep on the move if we want to keep up and follow our orders. Sting says Stellar shouldn't worry about what goes on with her superiors, so she doesn't." Stellar watched Harmony's face fall a little. "Onee-chan is sad, did Stellar say something to upset her?"

Harmony shook her head, fighting back tears that hadn't quite stopped yet, "It's nothing you've said, Stellar. You haven't done anything wrong, I'm just so relieved to see you safe and happy." She reached into her small bag, rummaging around in it until she found what she was looking for. "Here, this is for you."

Holding out a small box, she passed it to Stellar who looked at the box then at Harmony, before opening it. Inside was magenta crystal pendant, Stellar looked at it for several long moments.

"Onee-chan got this for Stellar?"

"Do you like it? I thought that it would make a nice present for you, to remind you that I'm always with you and that we're family. I'll always be with you if you have this Stellar, okay? And even if you don't, I'll still be there with you in spirit."

"Onee-chan..." Stellar stared at the pendant for several long moments, watching as it caught in the light. Then, she slipped it around her neck; the crystal bumping gently at her collarbone. "Thank you onee-chan. Stellar feels bad that she doesn't have a gift for onee-chan."

Harmony smiled, "That's fine Stellar. Seeing you is more then what I could have ever asked for." Before either young woman could say anything else, the older sibling spotted a soldier out of the corner of her eye talking to the café staff. She quickly paid for their drinks, which were finished, before taking Stellar's hand to leave.

"Where are we going onee-chan?"

"For a walk, is that okay? We can go down to the beach and look at the ocean, would you like that?"

"Stellar wants to see the ocean again! It's very pretty and blue too! She wants to see it with onee-chan!"

"Then let's go Stellar!"

"Yay!"

* * *

Luna woke up to frantic knocking at her door. Rolling over with a groan, she quickly dressed and ran a brush through her hair before opening the door to find Meyrin standing there. The worried, almost panicked, look on the younger Hawke's face alerted Luna that something was horribly wrong.

"Meyrin? What's wrong?"

Meyring bit her lip before blurting, "Shinn's missing! There's already a full-fledged search going on; no one knows where he's gone and the watchmen said that he took off in a real hurry this morning, but they don't know where he was headed!"

"What?! Shinn's gone?!"

"We don't know that for sure yet," Rey's calm voice reached them as he walked over to stand with him; though there was definitely worry in his pastel blue eyes. "He may have gone out for a walk or taken a drive up to the cliffs; we'll have to wait and see what the search results in."

"But this isn't like Shinn!" Luna asserted. "He might not be the most responsible person when it comes to telling other people about his whereabouts, but he wouldn't just get up and leave like this without telling someone or leaving a note! This isn't like him!"

"I know," Rey responded with a heavy sigh. "But there's not much we can do until the search is finished. All we can do is be patient and hope that Shinn's found."

* * *

Harmony sighed happily, but with a little sadness too, as she watched her little sister dash across the sand to where her friends were waiting in a convertible for her. She waved back at Harmony as she climbed in, yelling, "Stellar will see you onee-chan! Good-bye and Stellar loves you!"

"Bye Stellar! I love you too!" she watched as the convertible sped away before turning back to the ocean; her magenta eyes watching the waves crash on the shore and around her feet. She held her shoes in one hand as she wandered barefoot down the beach, wondering when Kira would call her to tell her where and when he was picking her up. He'd torn out of their hotel room this morning like a bat out of hell and she hadn't seen him since, all he'd said to her was that he'd call her later.

Shrugging off the weird situation, Harmony continued thinking about her sister and their situation, the beach's sand felt good under her feet and between her toes. Just as she rounded a corner of the small bay, her phone went off. Answering it, "Hello Kira! I was wonder when-"

"Harmony, Cagalli is on her way right now to get you." Kira's voice was short and to the point; something had flipped a switch in him, he was angry.

"Uh, okay." Harmony wondered what had happened. "Did something happen? You were in a real hurry this morning and you didn't seem too happy about something..."

"Your sister called me, from Shinn's phone."

"What?! Stellar did?! But how? When did she meet Shinn?"

"As far as I can tell? This morning. But that's not important right now, you have to get back to the Archangel right now; we're having a very important meeting and you need to be there." He hung up.

Harmony stared at the phone in her hands for several minutes before the roar of a car's engine's broke through her thoughts. Snapping the phone shut, she dashed to the car and hopped in the front seat beside Cagalli.

"Anyone care to tell me what's going on?" The blonde's eyes were hard and extremely wrathful, but Harmony could tell it wasn't directed at her; but still, what had both Cagalli and Kira so angry?

"It's that Zaft soldier that Kira brought back; he was raped."

* * *

Sleep now for Kat; she stayed up till one thirty in the bloody morning to finish this damn phase and she's quite proud of it so she'd like some reviews for her hard work! And don't ask why she's speaking in third person, she feels like it.

So please, please leave her some reviews? It makes her feel better about her long, sleepless nights when she knows that the hard work is appreciated, especially when she has her diplomas coming up and she should be spending her time studying instead of writing her fanfiction.

Read and review! Hope you enjoyed!

Kat.


	8. Phase 8: Interlude

**A/N:** I have no excuse or reason for taking THIS LONG to get around to posting or even writing a new part for this story, so all I can do is say that I'm really very sorry for my inactivity. Life's just been a big bitch lately and I haven't felt the drive for writing, in fact, I had a huge wall of writer's block for this story and didn't even know if I'd be able to finish it. But I've decided that I will, even if it kills me. The standard warnings apply to this chapter, just like all of the others.  
**Disclaimer:** Gundam SEED Destiny is the property of Bandai, Hajime Yatate, and Yoshiyuki Tomino; and not me. I only own Harmony and the plot; that's it.  
**Dedication:** This fanfic is dedicated to one of my closest friends, Kate. Thanks for the inspiration and all the times that you've been there for me. This story is for you.

**Phase 8: Interlude**

If anything, the fighting didn't give any of them much of a reprieve, but they were only monitoring the situation for now. Cagalli would let him know if there ever would come a time where they'd need to enter battle, and until then Kira wasn't going to leave Shinn's side.

The first few days had been the hardest, with Shinn waking up to nightmares whenever he even drifted off for a moment, and he flinched whenever Kira touched him in even the most slightest of ways. It hurt to see the strong young man whom he'd fallen in love with reduced to this, and Kira could feel the anger and vengeance burning strongly inside of him. But he kept those darker feelings buried, according to the doctors, they'd only serve to upset Shinn and he would probably take them to mean that Kira was angry at **_him_**.

Kira still hadn't successfully convinced Shinn that he still loved him.

Already he and Harmony had talked Shinn out of trying to kill himself several times, and it was beginning to wear on both of them. Kira knew that Harmony hadn't had a decent night's sleep in several days, and was running only on caffeine and adrenaline. She'd spend hours sitting or standing outside the door to his room, standing guard over Shinn and running errands whenever needed.

Slowly, though, Shinn was starting to recover, and Kira had reason to hope that things could regain some semblance of normalcy. He had no illusions that things would ever go back to the way they'd been before, Durandul had successfully destroyed that, but he had hope that eventually everything would work out.

It had been just a little over three weeks since they'd brought Shinn on board the _Archangel_, and people were starting to adapt to the young man's presence there. Sure, there were a few who didn't agree with the ex-ZAFT pilot being on board, but they'd learned early on that it was a good idea to keep their mouths shut.

Most of the people on board the _Archangel_ had served alongside Kira in the previous war, and respected him greatly, most of them were on very friendly terms with the young pilot and trusted his judgement. If Kira had brought Shinn onboard, then he'd done so for very good reasons. Very few of the crew members knew the full reasons as to why Shinn was onboard, but Kira had made sure that only those who really mattered knew.

Murrue had been very sympathetic to the young Coordinator and his predicament, "He can stay here as long as he needs too, and he doesn't ever need to fear any of us judging him for what happened."

As long as Murrue approved and had no problem with it, then Kira knew that no one else would raise a complaint about Shinn. Well, that was a little too optimistic. Someone probably would, but Murrue would dismiss it easily since she had knowledge of the full situation.

"We'll be following the _Minerva_ for the time being," Murrue ordered. "Since that ship has such a distinguished reputation already, I'm positive that both the Earth Alliance and Orb will be planning something like an ambush. If we want to try and stop this war, then we're going to have to get Orb to pull out of its alliance with the Earth Alliance."

Kira had entrusted Shinn to Harmony's capable supervision, explaining to the young man that he needed to attend this meeting. Shinn was dealing with some issues of abandonment, and it was taking a lot of work on Kira's part to reassure him that it wasn't the case.

"_I wouldn't leave you for anything, I promise that I'll be back as soon as I can. Until then, try to eat something, okay?"_

"I doubt that's going to work," Kira replied. "Knowing the Seirans, they've been pushing for this alliance for so long that they aren't going to let anything mess this up for them. I doubt even having the _Archangel_ and the _Freedom_ changing sides to ally themselves with ZAFT would even change their minds that what they're doing is good for themselves."

Cagalli looked down, her hands tightening into fists, "I have to try _**something**_! I got Orb into this mess by being weak-minded and tricked into believing that this was what was best for my country. I betrayed the ideals and principles of my country, and now the people are suffering for it! If there's anything that I can do to make this right, then I'm going to do it!"

"At the time, Cagalli, there was nothing that you could've done. You weren't of the mindset to stop that alliance, and even if you'd been vehemently against it, I'm sure that it would've passed anyway," Kira replied, trying to offer comfort to his sister even when he was distracted. "The Seirans would've thrown their weight around until they'd pressured all of the other ministers into agreeing with them. There really was nothing you could have done."

"But still..."

"For now, we have the chance to try and fix this. Let's start with what we can do right now and go from there."

~*~

"I'm sorry to report, sir, that the pilot Shinn Asuka hasn't been located. We believe that he's now MIA, most likely he was taken prisoner by the Earth Alliance."

The words echoed with a sort of cruel finality through the hall where much of the _Minerva_'s crew was gathered. It came as a shock to all of them to have lost Shinn like this, after all, they'd all become attached to the fiery young man in one way or another.

Instead of looking too concerned, the chairman merely frowned. This threw a wrench into his plans, he'd been counting on being able to keep the young Coordinator's strings in his hands for at least a little while longer. He knew that the Earth Alliance had nothing to do with Shinn's disappearance, but it was better if, for all intents and purposes, it looked that way. It would play into his plans better, that way, give the soldiers who'd known Shinn more incentive to fight and less reason to defect.

He couldn't count too much on Zala's loyalty, though. Durandul had no illusions about where the red coat's loyalties ultimately lay, and he wasn't about to put too much faith in the man staying with ZAFT if the truth were to come out. Athrun Zala would be much more likely to believe Kira Yamato then he was to believe Gilbert Durandul, and that was something that didn't sit well with him. He liked it when the pieces fell into place around him, where he didn't have to guess and second guess the motives of those people around him. Although, this made the game much more interesting.

And the Ultimate Coordinator had made one crucial mistake, he'd let Durandul know just how precious the young former red coat was to him. Before, Kira Yamato had been untouchable, a god among men, but now he was human with a very apparent weak spot.

Durandul had been counting on Shinn to be his knight, a valuable piece, but also his pawn. For if he controlled Shinn, then he controlled the White King as well. But now, he'd lost the black knight; the white king had stolen him away from him.

He'd need a replacement pilot, one who he could easily manipulate into doing exactly what he needed. If he was right in his estimations, then the perfect candidate to assume Shinn's place in his plans was standing right there in the room with him, not even six feet away from him.

"This is very distressing news," Durandul began, playing up his part to make it seem more believable. He needed the crew of the _Minerva_ to believe his act in order for his plans to come to fruition. "I had a lot of faith in Shinn, I believed that he'd go far. Is there any hope that we'll be able to get him back? Have any demands been made?"

"No, chairman."

Durandul stood up, slamming his fist onto the table, "Damn! LOGOs has to be behind this."

"Chairman!"

Regaining the composure that he'd never lost, only appearing to having lost it, Durandul straightened up and ran a hand through his hair, "I suppose we'll just have to leave it at that until we get more intelligence on whether or not Shinn is still alive, until then, I can't leave the _Minerva_ undefended."

Turning towards the assembled crew of the _Minerva_, Durandul's eyes settled onto the pink-haired pilot who his officers told him shared a close bond with Shinn. Her piloting skills had been just a little above average, nothing compared to Shinn and definitely not even comparable to Kira Yamato's, but she definitely had the potential to fulfill the role that Durandul had planned for her.

"Lunamaria Hawke."

"Yes sir!" The young woman snapped to attention, surprise written across her hardened features.

"I am hereby promoting you to the status of pilot of the _Impulse_, I know that you'll make Shinn and myself proud."

"Thank you sir!" Lunamaria's heart thudded in her chest. When she'd first heard the report that Shinn was missing in action and suspected to have been taken hostage by the Earth Alliance, she hadn't wanted to believe it. But the evidence had added up, and eventually her heart and mind caved into it. And with how nearly a month had passed with no sign of him... hope had deserted her.

"That's all I have to say on the matter for now, all of you are dismissed. The _Minerva_ is to begin preparations to make its way to the Gibraltar base, breaking through the Earth Alliance's stronghold in the Middle East on the way."

"Yes sir!"

It took several long minutes for everyone gathered in the office to leave, but eventually Durandul was left with only himself for company. He drifted over to the chess set which he brought everywhere with him. A frown creased his face as he removed one of the black knights from the board, and moved the white king, placing one of the white knights behind it. Now his chances to eliminate both the white king and queen were dwindling.

First his attempts to have Lacus Clyne assassinated early on had failed, foiled by the meddling of Kira Yamato, and now he'd lost his prized piece. Without Shinn, he doubted that he'd have much hope in ensnaring the Ultimate Coordinator within his trap. If he'd had Kira on his side, then he would have been unstoppable. If the _Freedom_ and the _Archangel_ were to join his cause, then no one would form a resistance against him.

After all, if the last war's heroes joined him, no one would question that his intentions were anything other then good. And, to him, they were good. He would be doing the world a great favour with his Destiny Plan, if only he could convince everyone else.

Shinn Asuka had been a key piece in his plans for victory, with or without the co-operation of one Kira Yamato. If it had truly just been rumours that his intelligence officers had gathered about Shinn's possible involvement with the pilot of the _Freedom_, then Durandul would've simply have to make certain arrangements so that he could eliminate Kira Yamato once and for all.

He'd been counting on Shinn for a lot of things.

Now, though, he'd have to rely on Rey and Lunamaria, his newest recruit. And with the proper manipulation and incentive, he was absolutely positive that he could morph Lunamaria into the perfect replacement for Shinn. She was a very passionate individual, and that was something that he could use.

"Lunamaria Hawke... you'll definitely prove useful in the end... and who knows, you may even be the key that I need to bring down Kira Yamato."

~*~*~*~*~

Sorry that it's so short, but I couldn't think of much else to put in here. The next part may be up in the next few days to maybe the next few weeks, I can't make promises to you guys anymore, other then I'm going to finish this story even if it kills me. But yes, please do excuse this chapter for its shortness; I'll make it up to you all with the next one.

More or less, I just wanted to give you all something to let you know that I'm not dead.


End file.
